


In Light of Things

by Ab_Memoria



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: A horror lvl in lbp 2 inspired this fic tbh, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst from the get go, Confident Katsuki Yuuri, Distorted Reality, F/M, Home isn't home, Look for the inconsistences between both universes, M/M, Multi, Other, So my friend talked me into making this a little darker then it needs to be, Survival Horror, Unreliable Narrator, Viktor with a K, Young Katsuki Yuuri, dark themes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-10-17 02:30:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 25,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10584555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ab_Memoria/pseuds/Ab_Memoria
Summary: 40 years of living and loving life could have never prepared Yuuri for this. His life is taken before its time and Yuuri finds himself back to do it all over again. He’s younger now and stuck at home in Hatsetsu heck he hasn’t even finished hitting puberty yet! Is it really the best time for his own personal redemption or will Yuuri change the fate of several people he loves? Probably not…right?Also why is he dreaming of an old bathroom?





	1. Death Takes No Prisoners

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by several time-travel fics in the Yuri Tag here and I’m not ashamed that I’m going to add another one.
> 
> Ya feel me.
> 
> So pretty much an angsty storyline with a lot of fluff and more opportunities for Yuuri to better himself even though his new reality is a lot more horrifying then he knows. And Viktor is pretty much the same till he isn't.
> 
> More emphasis on Yuuri then skating why cause this is going to be a rollercoaster yo.
> 
> Music I use will be in the notes for you to check out for the feel of the story.
> 
> So really anything is up for grabs. Also still bitter Yuuri didn’t win gold and get married, but season 2 could be a thing so who knows.
> 
> So #ConfidentKatsuki is a go.  
> (See the end of the chapter for

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In all honesty I'm going to mess with your feels. Death. Fear. Love. Poor Yuuri you will be missed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My love of little big planet 2 really grew this story yo. If you can figure out the level you will know how this alternative universe will go. Horror elements and death and rape will be a thing in later chapters. You have been warned.

The ground wasn’t something Yuuri liked to be acquainted with regardless of all the years he spent walking on the earth, but at the moment getting up seemed impossible. Tears welled up in his eyes as pain continued to blossom throughout his frail body. A metallic taste made its way into his mouth. Blood? He could feel the rocks and asphalt digging into his face.

The sun is already setting and the encroaching darkness seems to want to devour his very being. In the background screams are heard. Yuuri laid there on the ground as the noises around him are beginning to faded away. The only thing he could hear right now is the sound of blood rushing through his head.

-

Yuuri felt like dying, how ironic because that's what he was _doing_. The burning smell of what he assumed to be gun power filled his nostrils as he started to cough... His left lung felt torn and oh god did his chest hurt. To think all he was doing was getting some last minute shopping done. Yuuri was so sure the market would be quieter this late into the evening. Unfortunalty a robbery had been taking place when he entered …the gunman was screaming out for everyone to get on the ground.

-.

The man looked so wild and out of it. His bloodshot eyes were blown wide open as he shakenly pointed the gun to Yuuri telling him in drunken Russian to get on the ground. Forcing himself as low as he could Yuuri kept his head down. No need to cause the perp to lose what little composure he had. He knew he couldn’t fight back even if he wanted to he wasn't strong enough to fight a crazy drunk on top of said drunk having a gun.

-

The clerk was just as terrified as he was if not more. (She had the gun pointing straight at her now) The poor girl was shaking like a leaf as she tried to open the safe and keep the gunman from hurting her.

-

The wail of sirens cut through the tension as the assailant forced the clerk to instead open her register and give him all the money inside. The poor girl’s hands were shaking as she fumbled with her keys. It was apparent to everyone that in any moment this young lady could lose her life.

The thief began screaming obscenities at her to move faster, most likely to try and hide from the police that were steadily closing in. Time seemed to slow down after that.

\- - -

He could feel his body getting colder and listless. The pain in his chest was steadily growing worse. Every beat of his heart sent sharp pains everywhere whenever he tried to take a deep breath. A nap would be wonderful right now, but a soft voice was calling out to him. Actually, it was several, but the other voices were too far away or at least that’s what it felt like.

They were speaking a mix of Russian and broken English ....

Even though he couldn’t make out a single thing they said Yuuri knew the voices were trying to keep him from slipping away. Unfortunately for them the elderly man had already tuned them out. He knew he was done for. There wasn't much they could do to help other than trying to stop the bleeding. All the while all Yuuri wanted was to see his husband Viktor one last time. Just to wanted to listen to the sound of Viktor's soft voice before the darkness and light welcomed him.

Now he won’t get to. A few teasing breaths and his ability to see is also dwindling.

-

Sight and sound all leave....eventually it's just that Yuuri had high hopes it would be due to old age.

-

He can feel bitterness swarming his thoughts... he was actually going to die like this. 

Not of old age, but of being shot in a god damn shootout in front of a shitty convenience store.

Ha.

-

He's already pretty old and it's a shame he won't get to grow older. Yuuri can feel himself floating away bit by bit as everything around him seemed to dim. Unfortunately, he could now feel a pair of hands touching his face, maybe the ambulance workers are trying save him? He wanted to go home to his husband.

The hands that are touching him are strong and smooth not like his Viktor’s. They're warm too which feel great on his cold and tear streaked face.

(The tears haven't stopped falling yet.) 

\------

Kami he’s going to miss his husband’s hands. They were the one that caressed him in the night and held him in the light of day. 

It was always comforting to be surrounded by Viktor this way. When walking down the street they would join them together and Viktor would take to swinging them childishly. Their fingers and palms would join together when they danced, usually, that happened with Stammi Vicino playing in the background when they both did the chores at home.

His hands felt like home.

-

The searing jabs to his lungs were ebbing away though a dull thrumming was coursing throughout his body. Were the paramedics going to save him? Are they the ones touching him still? 

-

The assailant had his money, but with no way to leave… Yuuri was so much closer to the door that the robber decided to take him instead of someone younger. He was really stupid to think he could run away from the police with an old man trailing beside him. A gunfight ensued with Yuuri caught in the crossfires. The man panicked and well Yuuri had a few new holes in him minutes later after he was used as a human meat shield.

-

Yuuri was desperate for the pain to go away when a glowing light broke apart the dimming darkness… it’s a welcoming sight. He could barely hear the voices anymore. He knew he might not wake up from his nap soon, but he knows Viktor will be waiting for him when does wake up. He closes his eyes.

-

Minutes, hours, days could have gone by as he floated in the darkness… And after what seems to be an eternity, Yuuri woke up with no pain at all.

It was dark within the small room he was in, but something in the back of his mind felt that everything about where he was is off. He shuffles his body around the mattress and realizes that he’s not lying in a hospital bed. The bed was too big for him. There was also no scent of medical equipment. No beeping of any kind. Just him in a dark room alone… 

-

_(What?)_

-

Throughout the years Yuuri spent fighting his anxiety every episode told him all he needed to know about his own body. He was certainly no stranger to the sensations going through him right now. Panic and adrenaline were forcing him to blindly react to the situation. He's beginning to shake uncontrollably. Uncertainty and fear are palatable on his tongue now it tastes rancid. The hairs on his body are rising from the unfamiliarity of where he is.

  
Where is he!?!?!

He's going to have a panic attack any minute. His breath is coming out shorter and shorter, skin is crawling and clammy and his stomach is currently tying itself in knots. The Japanese man’s vision is fading fast.

-

First thing is first Viktor isn't here. Maybe the hospital couldn’t contact him? Or it was past visiting hours and he left. The thought of Yuuri’s beloved not being here besides him has him at the edge. He's tethering closer and closer to the abyss. That sensation isn't something he's had to really deal with in years.

He feels like the dark room is spinning. All Yuuri wants to do right now is run after a sense of familiarity. There isn’t any here.

Viktor _is_ home.

-

His body lurched up trying to escape. He's scrambling to remove himself from the bed. The sheet falls to the ground and his feet touch the floor. A nagging thought tickles him just now... Nothing hurts. Yuuri can feel his body isn’t as achy as usual though it should be with his old age and he certainly shouldn’t be feeling well after being sho...t? The darkness in this room is becoming familiar.

-

Did he pass out or just die?

Is this his own personal hell or purgatory?

He desperately fumbled around the room for a light.

-

After a few seconds of blindly groping an achingly familiar wall, he finds the switch near the door. He nearly screamed. It’s his old room back in Hatsetsu… he hasn’t been back in a few years not since his last family reunion and it most certainly it didn’t look like this anymore.

Mari’s grandson had it now.

Yuuri turned off the light letting out a quiet sob. Mentally blocking out everything within seconds of seeing his old room... the ever evolving monster that is his anxiety is trickling back into him full force and then again for the second time that night he lets the darkness devour and consume. He collapses on the floor.

...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You just had to die right Yuuri. Lol.


	2. Getting ahead and Looking Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Family had always meant everything to Yuuri and now with a chance for a re-do, he strives to be a better son to his mother Hiroko and father Toshiyo. He wants more and is willing to give it his best but first today’s date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is dedicated to Jane and a few others who left me some lovely comments. Also, Yuuri is actually way more OOC in this timeline than he really knows. I just won't let you guys figure it out yet.

Morning comes sooner than Yuuri expected after passing out and waking up in the past. He isn’t due to go to school yet if he's allowed to sleep in this late. Unfortunately, the fear of having to face his peers again has Yuuri claw his skin raw. the need to tear out his hair is strong, but he pushes it back.

-

However, everything comes to a standstill as he heard his mother’s voice: it's a voice he hasn’t heard in years calling him for breakfast.

-

…Hiroko.

-

His parents had been a constant in his life until thirty years into his marriage with Viktor, Hiroko bless her heart began to suffer from a number of ailments before succumbing to pneumonia, his strong hearted father’s health deteriorated hours after his mother’s passing.

Neither one could live without the other and death has them both.

-

They had a quiet funeral for them in Hatsetsu. Yuuri cried himself to sleep in his beloved’s arms that night. Viktor’s soft words comforted him until the morning. all he would go on about was how much fun they both were. It made him feel better. Yuuri wanted to stay in Hatsetsu for a few days after the funeral. Mari would need them both before they departed back the St. Petersburg: after settling their parent's affairs Yuuri and Viktor spent some time with Mari and her family. 

Mari would need them both before they departed back the St. Petersburg: after settling their parent's affairs Yuuri and Viktor spent some time with Mari and her family. 

It was nice.

Yuuri never ate Katsudon again after Hiroko died: his mother's _was_ the best after all. Viktor hadn’t mentioned it afterward he was such a considerate man.

His Viktor. The outside world felt further away now. A knock at his door jarred him away from reminiscing.

-

“Yuuri?”

“I’m coming Ha-Ha.”

-

Yuuri would have to embrace the outside world sooner or later better now before he lost his nerve.

-

Waking up in the past or at least what he thought was the past left him wholly disoriented and well he knew he was younger, but he didn’t know his actual age. Leaving the safe confines of his room Yuuri made his way to the bathroom.

-

Forcing himself into the bathroom felt more daunting as he counted his steps.

-

The mirror was closer now, he only had to peak his head out of the door frame.

-

Looking back at himself Yuuri could feel himself cave in. He looked way younger than he’d thought he would be, but that familiar sense of space was coming back. Soft short black hair, cherub face with wide amber eyes, soft body not even going through puberty.

He could guess 9 or 10 years of age give or take.

-

His curiosity wasn’t satisfied in the least he needed to know more.

-

Finishing up his morning routine he left the room only to hear a yipping noise in another room. Makkachin wasn’t here, but his Vicchan was!

-

Running off to the source of the sound Yuuri managed to run all the way to the dining room. And…there is an entirely different dog currently in Mari’s arms scrambling as his sister continued to pet and coddle him. Yuuri’s eyes focused on the Shiba Inu. The yellow dog was cute just not like his Vicchan.

-

Where in the hell was his dog?

-

The room was in the old style before the renovation at least that is a constant. Not wanting to seem rash he tried not to pay too much attention to his new pet. Maybe it would come to him if he waited long enough?

-

His father is already seated and just finishing up his meal. Taking a good long look at the man Yuuri almost let out a gasp. Wow, he looked so much younger than before.

-

Someone has to man the station before everyone gets on with their day. Trudging over to his father Yuuri greeted him with a firm hug before dislodging himself and doing the same with his sister.

-

There was a sense of calming familiarity in touching them. It warmed him from the inside leaving him doe-eyed and enamored. They all seem so familiar and new all at the same time.

How nostalgic.

-

The only thing that was missing was Mari's crazy hair. He would need to buy her some dye as a birthday gift then.

Yuuri wanted to take this moment and keep it with him forever. He was alive with his parents again, they were alive and he missed them so damn much.

He made a mental note to look for the date after breakfast.

He wanted to be with his family and mother for a while he missed them too much.

-

Hiroko made her way to them carrying a few things when Yuuri noticed her, not wanting his mother to work herself too hard Yuuri took over and finished setting up for his mother and sister. Not really caring about anything else Yuuri let himself drown in the morning ritual he usually took part of.

Eating.

-

Breakfast was a quiet affair with just the sounds of clattering utensils and chewing. His mother’s cooking was the best god did he miss it. Savoring it bit by bit Yuuri kept eating blissfully unaware of the changing atmosphere in the room. It wasn’t tense just confusing.

-

Mari stared at her brother in shock at what she had just witnessed. Was the world coming to an end!?!? He actually helped set the fucking table!!! Her little brother touched them!!!

-

Toshiyo looked over towards his wife as she ate her food slowly.

She's just as confused as they are.

This was new... this was truly unexpected of their son.

-

After waiting for his mother to finish her own meal he reached out to her and held her for some time not really noticing anyone else for that matter.

-

They all took notice of Yuuri’s affectionate behavior but decided to say nothing. Whatever this new episode was they would take it in strides just like everything else the world had thrown at them.

-

Yuuri knows he’s in shock. He's home, but he's a little kid again and right now all he wants and needs is his mother. Holding her helped keep the tears at bay, he wants to keep himself from crying and scaring the hell out of his family so hugs for now then he’ll breakdown in his room later on tonight.

-

Yuuri wasn’t a clingy child no matter how much he really wanted to be affectionate: it wasn't the way he was brought up here in conservative Japan.

-

It was even rarer for him to hold onto people for extended periods of time. Unless it was his husband of course.

-

Mari was beyond surprised by Yuuri's clingy behavior. Usually, he's an emotionless quiet stump who runs away from any physical contact. This kind of thing was genuinely out of character for the mentally ill boy, but Yuuri was a mess of contradictions lately that Mari let it slid.

For now.

-

This was worrisome...

Toshiyo would make it a point to talk to his wife about it later. He might need to bring the Doctor back in to check on Yuuri sooner this month if his emotional episodes were changing again. He was angry and upset yesterday not that he could remember why but now Yuuri was somber, quiet, and clingy.

This might be another change in his psyche and if it wasn't Toshiyo would welcome the touches none the less. He missed Yuuri's hugs now that he's had a taste. 

.

.

.

It was _so_ rare for Yuuri to initiate physical contact because of his emotional and mental health problems, it might be for the best if Hiroko spoke to Yuuri's therapist later on today. They didn't want to be caught off guard if they needed to put Yuuri on a new medication or something.

Better safe than sorry.

-

Yuuri felt his mother gently rub his back, he didn’t feel pressured to be more anything other than just Yuuri right now so he let his whole body lean against her's. He could repay his family’s kindness now. His only problem was where he stood. After letting go of Hiroki he sat down, drank his juice, and played with his new dog.

-

Breakfast afterward was an out of body experience to Yuuri, his mother was speaking softly to Mari about her plans for the future, his father was leaving to man the fort, but before leaving Toshiyo kissed his wife and messed up Yuuri's hair, Yuuri let out a soft giggle and waved his father goodbye.

-

Hiroko also spit out her tea when she heard her son laugh.

It's been so long since she heard that sound. Toshiyo almost stumbled over himself and Mari, she almost choked on her spit.

Yuuri was oblivious to all of them as he kept playing with Yuriko.

-

Mari looked excited as Yuuri heard her exclaim that she said she had applied for college in America and got accepted in Utah … what?

-

Well, that unexpected, but Yuuri was so happy for his older sister.

-

In his timeline, Mari got her degree after Yuuri retired from skating to coach stating she was upset with herself for missing an opportunity like that because of her grades and past. She wanted to reach for something too.

He helped along the way, of course, Mari did so much for Yu-topia he couldn’t resist making sure his sister could handle the workload and giving her pointers with some work that was way beyond her level.

It was a wonderful day full of celebration when she finally got her degree four years later. Their parents were so proud and Viktor managed to get drunk enough to climb up the Ninja house naked. Best day ever.

-

As he helped his mother clear off the table and wash the dishes Yuuri’s mind went back to his poodle. The new dog whose name was apparently Yuriko was curled up on top of a mat napping while Mari took photos on her phone. It was a relief to the young boy to see his sister happy, but he really wanted his Vicchan back.

-

The new dog whose name was apparently Yuriko was curled up on top of a mat right now was napping while Mari took photos on her phone. It was a relief to the young boy to see his sister happy, but he really wanted his Vicchan back.

He thought this might have been a better chance to keep him safe.

-

In 2012 during Sochi Vicchan was killed in an accident. He felt so crushed not having being able to be with his friend that he flubbed every jump in his program and essentially made a fool of himself and Japan in front of National T.V. Maybe he get his best friend back… things were different, but the future wasn’t set in stone here.

Maybe he'll get his best friend back… things were different here, but the future wasn’t set in stone.

-

First the date, he needed to get reacquainted with himself and his new reality. Time travel or some alternative it really didn't matter because he had no clue what was currently happening in his new life anyways and he was pretty sure he was still in elementary school at this point in his life too.

Was he currently going to school or was he on a break? Was he still attending Hinanodai Shogakko, maybe he could find out in secret?

-

Setting off in the direction of the fridge to put away some leftovers he spotted a calendar and the markings for the date. His school timetable showed that he was going to the same school as before so things wouldn’t be too far off. At least the boy hoped so.

-

March 27th 2004… wow so far off from Sochi. He was almost afraid he wouldn’t have time to retrain his body. He could probably start with his step sequences and work towards his jumps. Not having a coach meant Yuuri would have to compete nationally on his own for a while before he could and would allow himself to train as a Senior in time for the Seniors Grand Prix.

-

That gave him an idea of where to start.

-

Hiroki was already finished with the usual cleaning by the time she had noticed Yuuri’s odd behavior in the kitchen. He was more expressive and clung to her during their morning meal. This was truly turning out to be a shocking day full of little surprises. 

Her son hadn't been this expressive in such a long time, not since his incident three years ago. She was surprised that even remembered how to laugh when all he did for a year was scream and cry.

-

She noticed the way he kept looking at the calendar he seemed so glum and unresponsive then all of a sudden relieved. His emotions were finally showing up in his eyes and body... the elation and joy that radiated on his face almost made her cry.

She quietly made her way towards her son she wasn’t sure about his mood swings or mental state and just decided to be there for her little boy. She wanted to witness his happiness. It's what she had been dreaming of for years.

-

He would talk when he was ready. That little giggle he gave to his father told her that he was going to start speaking again soon. Hiroko couldn't wait.

-

If Yuuri did start trying to qualify for the Grand Prix in Sochi he would have to wait until the 2011 year to bring himself back up to true completion level. There was no point in trying too hard right now, especially because he was still growing and not even skating yet and he could at least build up a better persona for this.

He was Japan’s Ace for years before meeting Viktor, but he wanted something better.

-

He wasn’t unsure of himself right now he wanted more from this new life.

Now he had a chance to be better, to do better, and to truly meet his Viktor as equals. Looking over to his mother he notices her making her way until- He was swarmed in her embrace. Not realizing that his sudden change in behavior had caused her to worry he lets his mother fawn over him and later on that day went off to Minako's to train.

-

He’s got a lot of work to do and he'll need her help.

-

Walking towards his mentor and godmother’s studio he marvels at the old sites. He’s been to so many places over the years, but nothing beats Hatsetsu's skyline. Reminiscent of the past he nearly collided with a pole.

-

He says his hello’s to the man who fishes every day and left red-faced and embarrassed.

-

Minako is dancing by herself by the time he reaches her for his lessons.

-

She stops the second she sees him and waves him over to join her.

-

Realistically Yuuri's current goal is just to improve his stamina and flexibility for now. Then he’ll move onto his sequences and the jumps later on. Singles, doubles, and then triples.

Quads are going to have to come last he won’t put too much strain on his body yet. He's seen too many good skaters burn themselves out by introducing high level jumps too early… that also included Yurio.

-

He won’t do that to himself.

-

After setting up and letting himself be coached by Minako with his ballet Yuuri felt more at ease. His confidence is so high right now and he does his best while being silently observed by his teacher.

The hours roll by with Minako giving him instructions and some helpful advice.

-

Seeing her godson so passionate right Minako tries to imagine Yuuri as a danseur. To say she wasn't surprised when Yuuri blurted out that he wanted to be an ice skater was an understatement. It was a miracle ( and her great sense of balance) that she hadn't tripped over herself. Her head was reeling after hearing Yuuri voice...holy shit.

It's been over a year.

HOLYSHIT!!!!

-

This is quite the surprise.

-

While ballet is something Yuuri loved and trained for before ice skating he knows Minako wants the best for him and skating will be it.

She’ll see.

Later on that night after giving himself a good cry Yuuri starts his transformation. His mother’s hair care and growth products will be the starting point tomorrow morning and for now, he really needs to memorize his new turntable and settle in.

He's on break for now, but April is soon approaching and he'll have to face his school mates and try to get noticed by the JSF if he wants to make a name for himself.

-

The night gives him the much-needed peace he's been wanting for the past few hours.

.

.

.

It’s all feels mundane and boring… it leaves him feeling lax and alone.

He goes to sleep dreaming of Viktor and Home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol Yuuri your inner cutie pie is showing.


	3. Building Myself Up and Looking Down.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri knows everything about ice skating and now with 30 odd years of experience in coaching both seniors and juniors he knows he’s going to get there soon, but he has a therapist. And his family is too concerned with him: always talking about him behind closed doors. Why?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our sweet child has so much he's missed out on. but how do you know your own trauma if you're actually from a different reality?

They all met together in the mornings before most are awake. 

-

Yuuri's parent's, Mari, and Minako.

-

It's been a little over a week since Yuuri's hugging episode. A whole week since his quiet spell broke.

-

All four of them were just sitting around the dinner tables quietly discussing the surrounding mystery that is Katsuki Yuuri.

-

He had been a very distrusting of most people for the past three years with good reason.

When Yuuri came back from Hakodate Shōgakkō the boy had been angry and vicious: prone to random acts of aggression and violence for the first year than in the second year since his abduction he had been quiet and unresponsive to most stimuli.

-

His life revolved around school, medication, home, and Minako's Dance Studio. 

-

It was strange to see Yuuri laughing and comfortable with his surroundings...

-

Minako called them right after Yuuri left his ballet practice telling them herself that Yuuri had finally spoken. Hiroko sobbed into Toshiyo that night happier than ever, they were both elated that Yuuri was starting to be more open up again, but they still felt apprehensive to truly be content with this.

-

Almost three years since he's come back to them and he was acting as if nothing bad had happened. (they're suspicious of this) He was kind and open with them, trusting them without a care. Sometimes throughout the day Yuuri would sit down and tell him what he had done just to let them know.

Hiroko welcomed the change even if she was terrified that this was going to be just a phase...that once his mind was done with whatever this was that they all have to go back tiptoeing around Yuuri.

 -

 

But Hiroko was a dreamer and found herself welcoming all her child's touches. This was all just as wonderful as it was baffling. 

-

.

.

.

His sudden change in behavior had alarmed his family into and emergency session after seeing their little boy greet complete strangers. The family and Minako were one thing, but random people? No.

This was something his therapist said should have been impossible for now: especially with how Yuuri had been coping previously, but there he was, talking to everyone that entered Yu-topia...

-

It was a complete 180 from how Yuuri was just a week ago.

-

Their family gatherings are usually after his month to month therapy sessions were done. His Doctor would evaluate Yuuri's mental progress, had been trying to coax Yuuri into some form of communication that wasn't written, though it was a bit too late for that, but she was late this month so they all decided to wait for her to come by. N o one knew how to approach the traumatized boy.

-

Could their little boy have locked away that part of his life? Is he ok?

-

“Something’s off about Yuuri.”-

Mari spoke trying to keep herself quiet as possible. She had been sitting cross-legged at the dining table while recounting how many hugs her normally closed off brother had given her just the past week. It was over 20. He didn’t just hug people. That wasn’t her brother not after… after what happened.

- 

There was a long pregnant pause before Minako broke it.

-

“You all just noticed that Mari he's been off for like a week now?”-

Minako stated. She was currently raking her fingers through her long light brown hair as Mari counted the days on her fingers.

it was a little dorky

-

Now recounting her own tales about how far Yuuri has come in his classes. Minako couldn't hold back her smile, she was proud of how are her Godson was coming along

His fluid movements and artist expression were far superior to any of the actual students she has.

She just did this to help her godson to give him a safe place to move around and do something other than school and home. He wasn’t even supposed to be coming in that often, but she welcomed the change.

He’s there almost every day dancing and captivating anyone who stumbles by.

Yuuri can’t seem to be stopped. The ever evolving monster that is his skill and grace is prodigal.

-

But she’s still worried of course.

-

And to think he never took interest in ballet before.

-

Yuuri played soccer before he was abducted for god’s sake. He didn’t even like ice skating, Yuuko did, but now he’s so taken with the sport now she considered signing him up for novice competitions later on where he can qualify for them.

-

Hiroko off to the side wrapped in her own thoughts is only terrified for her Yuuri.

The therapist months ago previously stated that Yuuri had become repulsed by physical contact and had begun to mentally close off after what happened to him. She was afraid this was going to become something that they wouldn't be able to handle. She knew her little boy now wasn't the same, but this change wasn't something she expected.

He's was a completely different person now.

No one knew what to do.

-

How do you heal something so traumatic as being… forced to drink dirty bath water to survive. He was kept in an abandoned school, alone and scared, survived being tortured by a known predator at 7 years old. 

That man had done terrible things to her child. A monster who nearly ruined her boy for good.

He was a godless creature that preyed on the innocent and nearly ruined her boy for good.

-

She was grateful he hadn’t eaten…well, she tried not to think about that part anymore.

-

“He seems so different from then Minako is he really going to be ok? Yuuri seems to have forgotten that it ever happened in the first place. I don’t want him suddenly remembering and have panic attacks again.”-

Toshiyo tried to urge Minako on. Hiroko was thinking quietly to herself again and was barley paying them any attention. She would engage them when she was ready.

Hiroko was thinking quietly to herself again and was barley paying them any attention. She would engage them when she was ready.

For the few years, all he wanted to do was help Yuuri regain his mental stability help his son gain back his sense of safety and control. His parental instincts drove him further into his own form of depression as his thought were consumed by Yuuri's wellbeing.

Did he eat today or did he throw up again? Was he being treated well at school or ostracized by the other children? Would Yuuri speak to them this week or was there a note hidden away for them to read? These thoughts buzzed around his head making sleeping and working a bigger chore than it should have been. Hiroko his pillar of strength during the nights when his thoughts consumed him.

-

But as a father Toshiyo was willing to go as far as he could for Yuuri even if he was still so tired from everything that had been their lives for the past three years.

-

Yuuri was finally coming into himself without them or their help and everyone was feeling on edge.

Could this change be for the better? If this was just the first steps in Yuuri's recovery he'd carry his boy through that threshold because Yuuri deserved to have his family go the distance for him.

-

The first year back from that nightmare was grueling. Tip-toeing around their son because he was too emotional and angry, then the next year only brought silence and nothing. He wouldn’t let anyone but his dog touch him. They tried to keep their distance. Yuuri needed space, but how does one ignore their desire to hold and care for their child?

-

“I know it’s odd for him to suddenly become a different person, but I’m sure he’s just coming into himself now. It’s been almost three years and maybe is Yuuri’s ready to move forw- oh shhit he’s coming.” - Minako voiced hushing them all down. No need for her to trigger Yuuri into a panic attack.

-

When Yuuri came into the dining room he knows his family and Minako have been taking about him. Again.

Not even a week after he “came back” and he’s sure everyone had noticed his increasingly strange behavior.( It’s not for that reason you silly boy.)

-

He takes better care of himself and he’s been exercising more as of late he’s also making his mother and father do it too.

-

His anxiety made him do a lot of stupid shit and his body had been the first thing he abused. Chewed lips, picked at skin on his finger tips, and appetite changes so severe it concerned his family the first time he had a depression episode. He wanted to keep himself healthier mentally and physically.

His health had to come first. Viktor would have wanted that.

-

Growing and having gone through puberty he knew how rough it would get the worst part of all that for had Yuuri his mood swings. They were a bitch and the emotional eating hurt more than helped. Viktor helped with that after one too many incidents during their first year as fiancés.

-

Countless sleepless nights in his other lifetime were always too for him. He's being strict with himself, making sure to go to bed on time and have a routine to keep him on sane.

-

He might even need anxiety medication in this lifetime too if he begins to have problems, but now he wasn’t afraid to do it. Therapy and anxiety medication made a big difference after Viktor convinced him to get help; he wished he gotten it sooner. 

Maybe he wouldn’t have been such a mess after his Junior skating years if he had.

- 

A few changes he's made are already starting to show.

He’s been letting his hair grow out just like when he and Viktor went to St. Petersburg to train after the Barcelona Grand Prix. He missed his long hair. He needed it to feel at least a little like his old self just until he could be with his Viktor again…

He missed his long hair. He needed it to feel at least a little like his old self just until he could be with his Viktor again…

.

.

.

And maybe a few anime characters inspired him, but that was besides the point.

-

School was going fine as he as far as he could tell.

-

He doesn’t have too many friends right now but with his new confidence and improved grades, the student body has begun to take notice. (He wasn’t always like this though.) But the boy could tell a few students are a little wary of him, but he doesn’t know why.

-

So far he's excelling at everything the current school system throws at him. They even take him out of a certain classroom and move him up with other advanced students. It nice to be noticed for his hard work.

It nice to be noticed for his hard work.

-

He does want to focus on skating more so he’ll ask his mom to pull him out and get him online courses in a few years. But for now, he is still in school, dancing, and skating, the three things he is familiar with.

-

It’s odd being here heck he didn’t even notice the first few days back that his room isn’t littered with his husband's face and this time it won’t be.

-

Yuuri decided that in this lifetime he won't allow himself to put Viktor on a pedestal. And no he didn’t buy the god awful load of posters but he did get a few that he really did like. He redecorates his room on Friday night and really lets himself be who he wanted to be the first time around. No filter to stop him from letting his family know how much they mean to him.

-

Thinking back on his career while eating with Minako and his family Yuuri gave a soft sigh. (Hiroko noticed it)

Yuuri liked his Ace status very much the first time around, but after the pressure of having to be the best got to him, he stopped applying that term to himself.

He wanted something new; he wanted to be something eclipsing, something his lover deserved the first time around. A Better and stronger Yuuri.

It will take a while to get there but he has the time. He'll be with his lover again one day.

-

Later on that next week a young lady comes by. She's his therapist and she came to evaluate him...

-

The woman asks him questions he doesn’t have the answers to.

His mother only weeps and holds him after the hour session is done.

Toshiyo tries to keep the conversation away from Yuuri’s ears.

The therapist leaves and well he’s so far removed from what’s going on he doesn’t her notice go.

-

He never needed a therapist as a kid. Is he messed up here in this world? Did they know he needed help with his anxiety sooner?

-

The next month comes around (It's May) and she’s back… every month it’s the same. (June, July...)

Tears on his mother’s face and hushed voices asking when and if he’ll be ok.

It's unnerving.

-

But Yuuri keeps dancing, studying, and growing... all the while wondering what the hell is going on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow Yuuri you really can't remember, can you?


	4. Sailing Away to Lands Unclear.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Progress is slow, but Yuuri’s happy he’s got Minako on his side. The boy still hasn’t gotten the answers he’s looking for. Minako knows only a part of the story... so does the town. Trying to piece it together on her end is easy, Yuuri’s side not so much. Pov change here and get ready for the spooks and feels son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You just keep them guessing Yuuri I'm sure no one will mind. (They do.)

Hatsetus’s purple skyline greeted Yuuri as he made his way to Minako’s Studio from home. School was uneventful as always though the sports festival would be going on in a few days. almost 6 months have gone by with Yuuri diligently working towards his goals.

-

His therapy sessions are shorter now and the poor boy still hadn't a clue why his mother continued to cry, he wasn’t having his anxiety attacks flare up as often. The calming exercises have helped keep it in check.

-

It’s worth noting that he hadn’t been told why he’s getting treatment not even when he tries to pry the answers from his ha - ha. The only real thing he gets out of it is that severe emotional trauma caused him to lock up certain memories.

What kind? He's not sure. Hiroko won’t tell him and she’s sworn both his Chi-chi and Mari-neesan into not telling him. (They don’t want another catatonic episode he’s getting better)(… at least till the memories come back dears.)

-

The soft thud of his sneakers on the pavement was pleasant to his ears. He was glad to be out of the house. It's been getting really intense lately.

-

His parents have been acting strange since March and he didn't like it. 

His sister isn’t as enthusiastic as before either, but they have 7 years of a difference still so it’s not like they hang out or anything.

She is however very insistent that she has to pick him up from school every day.

It sort of pisses him off, but he allows her.

-

The strong autumn air whipped Yuuri’s luscious hair around. It was well past his shoulders, the deep conditioning and hair growth have been doing wonders

It was well past his shoulders now, the deep conditioning and hair growth have been doing wonders for it.

-

Viktor would have loved it… his long hair. Yuuri hadn’t watched any of his competitions yet. He knew them all by heart anyways... at least that’s what he kept telling himself. In reality, he knew the real reason why.

Seeing Viktor and not being able to touch him would feel agonizing.

The nights grew lonelier and colder as he lay in bed without Vicchan or his husband.

-

Is that what Viktor lived with? His lover was so strong. Not wanting to be seen cradling his ring finger Yuuri opted to buy a set of cheap gold rings and wear them around his neck. It would be better to keep away from his prying family.

Not wanting to be seen cradling his ring finger Yuuri opted to buy a set of cheap set of fake gold rings and would wear them around his neck an old silver chain he found. It would be better to keep away from his prying family.

-

His new dog was a delightful thing too.

Yuriko - she kept the loneliness at bay. Played with Yuuri and treated him well she was a sweet girl. The boy still missed Vicchan but after going to the pet store for some food he didn’t find any poodles there. None… maybe he missed his chance?

Putting his (first?) dog out of mind Yuuri took the steps up to Minako’s studio.

-

It’s not the worried expression his Ryoushin would wear that greeted him as he entered his Godmother's establishment. Minako gave him a soft smile as he crashed into her. She didnt flinch away from his hugs...

-

Ah, Minako- he could kiss her right now- she gave him more time in her studio and a key.

-

He doesn’t want to be home right now, his parents might be talking about him again. His Kyoubo is heaven sent she’s even looking into getting him a few costumes ready for some local competitions in Hatsetsu.

His Kyoubo is heaven sent she’s even looking into getting him a few costumes ready for some local competitions in Hatsetsu.

-

He’s proud of how far he’s coming along… his Vitya would be proud too. He can feel the familiar sting of tears beginning to well in his eyes, blinking them back he presses forward into another complex set of steps.

-

He’s been working on his side steps and incorporating more ballet into his programs. He’ll take a chance at trying out for the novice competitions next year or two, but without a coach, he’ll need to beat out the rest of the competition to get the JSF’s attention.

-

All the while far into the corner of her dance studio Minako is contemplating.

-

Two years ago her godson had been alone in his head lashing out at everything that moved and would spend hours crying. A year later the silence followed…

Minako swore to herself that she wasn’t going to stand by and let Yuuri fight alone anymore.

-

She’s seen how different Yuuri was from himself at 7 and now almost 10 and he’s far from ok. She isn’t a doctor, but repression of emotional trauma isn’t what is going on with her rising student.

-

He was emotionally closed off for months now and then all of a sudden he’s acting as if that nothing terrible had happened. That was a load of bullshit if she ever heard it.

-

This boy wasn't the same one that she knew. He was dancing with more passion instead of doing it as a way for Hiroko to get him out of the Onsen, He skates with a grace that she was sure she didn’t help him hone, and now a little over 6 months after his little transformation he speaks with a firm and commanding voice, and it’s everything she’s ever wanted from her godson.

-

Confident and strong willed, but far more compassionate than before. But Yuuri is also burying the pain, him mind is doing this to him and their isnt anything that she or the Katsuki family could do to help.

-

But it's nice to see the boy actually smiling now. That’s the greatest gift she’d ever been graced with, he’s healing.

-

Saito Koyo nearly broke Yuuri, hurt and destroyed an innocent child. She was glad the man was gone… even if she never got to strangle the man to death herself.

-

At least that’s what the police stated to them... they never did find the body. That part terrified her. Though the only one who knew for sure was Yuuri and well he hadn’t given them any indication that the monster was alive.

-

That part terrified her. Though the only one who knew for sure about his whereabouts was Yuuri and well he hadn’t given them any indication that the monster was alive.

An almost 7-year-old Yuuri survived something that would have torn lesser men to pieces. God was he a brave child to continue to face each day with a smile noMinakoako wished she could have his strength.

It would have been useful to have that kind of resolution when she had been a beginning dancer.

-

The only thing that was irking her right now was that Yuuri seemed to have forgotten his trauma.

Poor Yuuri

-

Looking again at his form and grace she wished Yuuri had taken to dancing, but he was adamant that he could and would compete. In Ice Skating of all things. She even saw a few posters he bought a few months ago.

Viktor Nikiforov was the young man’s name… Yuuri sure did have good taste in men. 

-

Yuuko shrieked when she found out Yuuri knew who that was.

The girl was excited to finally find someone she could gush about Viktor too. It was a little cute when Yuuri tried to hide some posters his friend gave him. he stuffed them into his dance locker... She might have snuck a peak during their break.

-

That blushing fidgety boy wasn't isn’t her Yuuri.

-

She’s didn’t know why her heart was suddenly so sure her Yuuri is gone. This boy isn’t an imposter by any means but she misses the strangely serious kid he was… He would challenge everyone and anyone to show them he was better.

_He was._

-

The dancer wouldn't lose hope the one day that Yuuri would come back, but for now, she’ll embrace this Yuuri with everything she has.

-

The police kept everything tight lipped no one really knew what happened. The Katsuki's never got the justice they deserved. Everything they long for was ripped out of their grasps by the incompetence of the local law enforcements. It made her angry enough to never go back to that town again.

It made her angry enough to never go back to that town again.

She still hasn't gone back.

-

Still, the feeling was depressing that this was so much deeper than Minako knew. Yuuri's memories were already fragmented from his abuse and it wasn't like Yuuri talked to them about what happened during his captivity. One day he might open up about that, but they wouldn't push him into telling them anything he wasn't ready for.

Yuuri's memories were already fragmented from his abuse and it wasn't like Yuuri talked to them about what happened during his captivity. One day he might open up about that, but they wouldn't push him into telling them anything he wasn't ready for.

One day he might open up about that, but they wouldn't push him into telling them anything he wasn't ready for.

-

Yuuri didn't want to talk to them about Saito only the police got the story. It left Hiroko devastated that Yuuri didn't trust them enough to show that side of him she would often call Minako to let her know how Yuuri was and if he would be going to his lessons.

It left Hiroko devastated that Yuuri didn't trust them enough to show that side of him she would often call Minako to let her know how Yuuri was and if he would be going to his lessons.

They were family forged by tragedy and lent each other strength when they needed it.

-

The forgetting was unnerving, the lack of reasoning. It's almost been three years since his abduction she would have thought that something like that would have happened sooner not years afterward.

-

It’s as if Yuuri’s mind erased itself and started over.

He was now a mess of contradictions wrapped in uncertainty. Their mess, but maybe given the circumstances Minako would give Yuuri the benefit of the doubt.

That maybe he’ll be ok.

-

Darkness tainted Yuuri and it would come back to haunt him forever. Minako would pray every day if that's what it took to give her godson some peace in life.

Maybe the forgetting was his way to start over? Perhaps the ballet and skating were his mind's way of helping him cope with the loss of his voice.

She isn’t a doctor she’s only a dancer, but she hoped that this was the case.

-

His mother and father are rightly worried though what if he couldn't  handle his memories: when they do return.

-

The Katsuki family would do their best to keep Yuuri safe it was something the boy deserved.

-

They would make sure their sweet boy wouldn’t fall apart on them, not if they could help it.

He was still a naïve child that needed to be protected and they would provide him shelter.

That's what family did... protect each other.

-

Always.

-

The former Benois has her connections and a friend in American that could take Yuuri from the novice competitions to international levels… at least when he’s ready to go that far.

He looks so _ready_ to take on a real challenge.

-

While she loves Yuuko and is happy to help her out with her own skating she isn’t nearly as talented or dedicated as Yuuri.

She also had more responsibilities at school and couldn't spare too much time at the rink, but she is a fun sport to be around while Yuuri trained there.

She often asks the boy to perform some of Viktor’s routines with her for fun. He’s better than Nikiforov… much more expressive and even if his jumps are only doubles and triples he’s got talent.

-

After a few hours spent dancing and then skating Minako sends Yuuri went home.

-

He needed his sleep after all- her dancing prince.

-

That night Minako spends a few hours online looking up her godson’s articles. If she could find any?

-

They’re pretty hard to find since he was too young to have his name plastered on the news.

-

But a set of links has her on the right track. At least she hopes.

-

-

Local elementary students abducted. 2000

"Residents are in fear for what have been speculated by local police as a series of abductions. Several school-aged children have been reported to be missing (7). Parents are urged to walk their children to and from school. -"

-

No that wasn’t it, but it was close. Yuuri was taken a few months after some of the kids had been found.

Those idiot police officers thought he would be found sooner, after all, all the other abducted children turned up.

-

He wasn’t found until almost three months later. His case was unrelated to the school kids. His and Hinata’s were far worse.

The next few links sent her to other children’s profiles and articles and after browsing for several hours she only managed to find a link for Yuuri’s abduction poster. The same one Mair posted to try and help her brother's face reach a wider audience. She guessed Mari hadn't taken it down yet...

-

His school photo had been taken a week before Saito took him.

That was the one they used for the poster.

-

That boy looked smug and proud. His large brown eyes were crinkled in a soft smirk. 

-

She could almost hear his soft voice challenging the bigger kids at the local park.

“Make me.”

That Yuuri wasn’t too far gone. Right?

-

After the police couldn't find anything else from his old school Yuuri's case went cold.

The Katsuki’s were sure their son’s school knew something about their little boys’ disappearance. _(They did.)_ It was horrifying when tried to convince the police that Yuuri was a troubled student that most likely ran away. The slander the school tried to put on Yuuri and the Katsuki's was buried under the scandals that broke out throughout the weeks following the investigation.  
  
First, the principal committed suicide when it was discovered he was having an affair with a teacher. Then parts of that building flooded leading to an emergency evacuation. Minako didn't but it she was sure the officials were trying to coverup evidence and she was right.

-

Hinata… had been abducted from that school Just a few weeks prior to Yuuri.

-

Everything would have dried up if the students hadn’t spoken up.

-

The janitor was to blame for the missing kids. He was creepy and tried to touch some of them.

-

He looked at the boys wrong, yelled and chased the girls away when they got too close.

Sneered at them as if their existence was a curse.

-

"He tried to hit Izumi." whispered a few children to the police. they didn't listen until more students poured in with their own stories...

Saito wasn’t supposed to be working at the school, he was an offender but they kept him.

-

The problem was that the man was fired only a week into the investigation into the principals past.

-

The stories kept piling up for the officals at that school that they had no choice, but to shut it down.

-

Everything there seemed to fall apart after that.

-

Yuuri was still missing with no hopes of finding him alive and Hinata's family refused to help the Katsuki's look for her.

Saito seemed to disappear into thin air, that part scared them. Did he have Yuuri? Was Hinata alive at this point too?

-

The police were ignorant they never bothered to look for Yuuri in the old school a few miles away. Even with the admission that a pedophile might have abducted him close by.

-

"It's going to be torn down soon anyways and it's been tape off to the general public for weeks now." the police stated. 

-

But low and behold Yuuri was found there, naked, alone, and in need of help. It Yuriko that lead a group of kids to him.

It was Yuriko the yellow Shiba Inu that lead a group of kids to him.

She was grateful the little dog had found her godson ... even if those kids had been in were in for a terrifying sight that night.

-

According to one of the group members, the blood trails in the hallways forced one of the kids to pull out his phone and call the police, that action inadvertently saved Yuuri from dying in the building from exposure and starvation.

-

Hours past slowly while Hiroko, Toshiyo, and Minako were stuck in the hospital with Yuuri sleeping quietly beside them. He was unresponsive after the rape kit had been done. His body was weak and malnourished. His abductor (Saito) limited Yuuri's food intake to keep him from having any strength to defend himself and to keep Yuuri inline.

-

It was apparent that Yuuri would never be the same... the scars on his body would remain forever. And the Katsuki's plus Minako would be in for a long fight ahead.

.

.

.

 

Minako slept restlessly that night trapped in the gaze of fear the faces of other children that weren't found in the area haunted her.

-

No one knew enough about what Yuuri had gone through for those months and he wouldn't and shouldn't be forced to.

He wasn't ready.

-

On top of that, the stress of knowing Saito's body was never found made her nauseous... Was her god son actually safe?

Minako tried not to let it eat at her, but she was sure tonight wasn't going to be easy on her.

-

.

.

.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You should stop while you're ahead Minako it will be so much safer for you.


	5. It Lives Under the Skin.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri could count on a lot of things, his family, Yuriko, and Minako, but as the weeks slowly go by he finds himself at a loss. They aren’t the same. Nothing is vivid before he “woke up”. It all feels wrong. Is he wrong? Is Hiroko onto something?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for your daily dose of feels and remember folks I has no shameeeeee. Nothing Yuuri does makes sense anymore. He truly is the odd ball out, but so is his family or so it seems.

It’s winter break in December when Yuuri has enough time to really look into his new life.

-

All bundled up in his room lying in bed, Yuriko is snoozing at the foot of his bed tonight.The night is peaceful and quiet with snow softly falling outside, but it's too quiets and the intense silence makes his thought churn uncontrollably.

- 

His misplaced anger and sadness rolled out in waves and engulf him in its tiring heat. He's tired of this, the lack of knowledge and context he has in this life. There are things here that don't match up to his other lifetime. 

The room containing his awards and prizes from his school years are missing, so are many photos. It's like everything is the same in this world except he's an intruder. Looking at all the things Mari has compared to him pissed him off.

-

He's tossing again in his bed, Yuriko gets up and lays beside him. Good girl.

-

Yuuri can feel himself festering with questions he doesn’t have the answers to.

_(It aches deeply inside his ribs to not know.)_

Why is he kept separately from the family? Where are his photos? Is there something they know about him that he doesn't??

God, he wants the answers so badly ...he needs them to be whole.

-

There is so much he's missing right now, his Doctor won’t talk to him and if she does it's always cryptic, she tells him it will come back _(his memories)_ and he’ll learn to deal with it when they do.

She tells him often that "His family only wants what's best for him and for them to call her if they have any questions." He's given pills to tamper him down.

-

Deal with what and how will he know?

Is he suddenly going to go crazy when he remembers?

If he ever does... he can only hope that these missing pieces will give him the answers he's looking for.

-

.

.

.

Certain noises have him on edge now even if it's a sound he’s used to hearing.

-

The sound of the faucet creaking makes him want to punch the closest wall, thesoft _drip drips_ of water have him scratching his skin till it turns an ugly red, and the rustling of leaves make him jump. It's those little things irk him and he can't stand them right now. He was sure it was a little over a month ago that he noticed the change.

Yuuri noticed how his skin would crawl when the faucet handle squeaked it made him apprehensive to wash up properly although he still did it. He's always sure to turn off the faucets all the way... to prevent the _drip drip drips_ from annoying him. When he heard the sound of the trees blowing in the wind late at night he almost cried out for it to stop. 

-

Yuuri's sense of self feels off too like he's almost warped in his own body: something or someone is sharing his physical space and he can't push them away, but that feeling only comes at night when he's not tired enough to fall asleep.

He's lost during those nights, with no sense of control over his body, he's tried everything he can think of to get it back. Sometimes _he_ gets up and wanders around the inn late at night thought he know it's not him who is using his body.

_(Autopilot?) (possession???)_

-

Yuuri's has also begun to take notice of strange things happening to him at home, like how his appearance changes whenever he's next to a mirror. Whatever is following him waits till he's too tired to make its move. It plays with the shape of his nose, the sharpness of his eyes, and the way he moves.

-

It nearly made him piss himself when he accidentally caught his gaze in the bathroom mirror late one night in November. 

-

The shadows were playing games with him again now it was changing the shade of his eyes from warm caramel to black, it was making his hair look like tendrils instead of his soft beautiful locks. 

It's a sinking sensation that forces Yuuri to hold off going to the bathroom late at night now.

He would rather wet the bed than look at his reflection on accident again. 

-

Like a door in his mind, it's pushing him near the entrances and pulling him away at the same time.

-

Everything from before his awakening is out of sync with his previous reality.

He can’t even remember when he started feeling like the world wanted to cave in.

That shouldn’t be what’s happening.

He was getting better.

-

Yuuri wanted to stay strong, but Vicchan and Victor aren’t here.

-

Maybe he should have _stayed_ dead. That would have been better than dealing with the overbearing feelings he's having, the lack of peace he feels in his own home, his room, his mind. something otherworldly is tainting him.

He’s so alone and at the same time not. His family is here, but even they are completely off from what he remembers. He’s dead in his own lifetime and probably being mourned by his lover.

Tears are falling again and Yuuri doesn't try to whip them away. It's useless to try.

Crying helps relieve the stress and pain in his heart even after his sobs ebb away into soft shudders it’s was better than the intense attacks he used to have. But not by much because those feelings still come back to chase his happiness away.

-

-

Nothing here made sense here either. His photos and personal belonging aren’t showcased like before either. He could look into a small room and find a photo or two of Mari, just not his. (They didn’t want his son’s story leaking out... it did.)

The boy draws blanks when he looks at certain photos, photos he’s sure he didn’t have in the old timeline. Kids he’s smiling with that look familiar but only for the moment, he's in a soccer field of all places when some of the theses pictures are taken.

He never liked soccer before...Did he have a different life here? 

Is he changing things for the worst in this reality or is this his life to do as he wishes with it?

-

Sleeping off the paranoia had been getting hard to do as well. The walls have eyes. The shapes the darkness composes in the night makes his heart race he can't calm it down for hours after they play games with him. The quiet bedroom with his labored breaths is the hardest thing to endure, but he does. Yuuri blesses Yuriko several times during these kinds of nights, she keeps him from being too afraid.

Her soft pants remind him to keep breathing...

-

“Take a _deep_ breath Love.” Is what Viktor would have said. 

-

He tires.

-

Just like in his therapy sessions. He tries. The doctor _tries_ to help him make sense of the images that the darkness project all around him. She's not helping...

-

He’s trying to be strong again. Doesn't want to make a fuss, doesn't want his family to crowd him like they're doing now.

It’s something he doesn’t need, the crowding (the panic attacks), but he doesn’t want to tip off the doctor that he's having them, his mother will go nuts if she found out. She'll put him on something new _again_ if he tells them.

-

The Doctor won't be coming back for a few more months this time, it's the little things he's holding on to.

-

.

.

.

_Maybe if he spends enough time in the bathroom at home the people in the mirror will snatch him up?_

-

The morning comes sooner than he likes, but time waits for no one, after washing up and Yuuri joins his family for breakfast then goes off to do his own thing.

-

Yuuri is sucked back into his musings as he continued to surveys his sister. Mari had been packing away for her trip going back and forth from the Attic to her room. She’ll be leaving for America soon. Maybe he’ll get to be alone for a little bit longer now. Unless his parents decided to hound him after Mari leaves.

-

.

.

.

Now came the depressing thoughts again…this family is… so off.

-

It’s not like they love him less or abuse him or anything like that. They just seem more different in personality than what he had in his own world.

Inconsistent. Fakes. He doesn’t need their sympathy… just wants them to be like before.

-

His sister’s smiles don’t reach her eyes when she looks at him.

This Mari is almost a completely different person from his own sister. She’s a little less crass, but far more dramatic almost valley girl instead of former Yankee. She did dye her hair though; it’s just as wild and vivid as he can remember. It’s almost like she’s the same if he sees her from afar.

Hiroko is far more overbearing. She touches him too much. Her touches foreign on his skin, as if he could touch her, but not be touched himself.

Unsettled is what he feels when he thinks about it: The first few months all he wanted to do was hold them, but now as his family swarm him in their clutches all he wants to do is break free.

It’s suffocating.

 

The touching needed to stop. He didn’t like his arms and back touched at all. It's burning him.

-

Lately, it's a miracle if his father lets him play outside without supervision. Something he rarely did when he was growing up. His Chichi holds his hands when they go outside (he’s 10) and it’s embarrassing. He lived most of his life being alone in his own bubble and now it’s draining trying to get some freedom from all the watching.

-

They’re always in his space, checking if he needs anything… a desperate need for them to be useful to him.

He can’t seem to find a release from it… except when he's in his own room or using the restroom.

-

He remembered being a shy and nervous child in his own youth, the bullying made him lose a lot of his self-esteem and tore at his insecurities when the kids would make fun of his weight. Back then his parents always tried to encourage him to be more outgoing. Now all they want to do is keep him under lock and key. 

-

Mari never lets him go to school on his own even though he’s  _ **10**_ and can afford to be given some space. Hiroko cries when his therapist talks to her (whatever that bitch is telling her) and it makes him feel like a failure. Toshiyo always keeps him away from the conversation so he's never able to defend himself from his doctor's words.

 

This was sheltering to the extreme. His parents never want him to leave their sight. It's grating on every nerve the boy possessed. The hawk eyes that his parents give him penetrate his very being.

-

_**It’s just too much!!!!** _

-

They do relent when he wants to go to his god mother’s studio and the rink.

All the hard work he's been putting in towards his goals will pay off...soon.

His programs are coming along beautifully and when they see he can win maybe his family will back off.

-

 

.

Minako tries to give him space to train, but she’s had to keep him safe.

Her gazes scorch his back too. He can tell she's hounding him in her own way, she just quieter about it.

-

School had been progressing just fine, he begins to receive higher marks than most of the class and the headmaster might even let him move up a grade if he can keep doing well for the next few months. He even managed to be his class a win in the running portion of sports day, but then again he was bullied as a kid, he needed to be fast. Here in this lifetime, however, he wasn’t bullied, just isolated.

-

The students seemed wary of him and tried to keep their distance. He was fine with that he didn’t remember too many kids his own age playing with him anyways. Especially the older kids.

-

The teachers are another story. Seemingly otherworldly in their own way. They don’t touch him, but they want to. Before in his own world he could keep to himself and blend in, but his teachers tend to continuously pick on him more often.

Trying to get him to open up, to talk more, or be more open. Prying. How open do they want him? Would he have to carve out his glass heart and show it to them? Some of his teachers want to keep him back in class a while longer after the class leaves.

Prying. How open do they want him? Would he have to carve out his glass heart and show it to them? Some of his teachers want to keep him back in class a while longer after the class leaves.

How open do they want him? Would he have to carve out his glass heart and show it to them?Some of his teachers want to keep him back in class a while longer after the class leaves.

Some of his teachers want to keep him back in class a while longer after the class leaves.

-

He didn’t like it.

They wanted him to talk about himself.

How was his home life? Did his parents help him with his studies? ( That kind of improvement in a short time would make anyone as questions)

-

Why exclude him like that? Why pry. Did they know something he didn’t? Most likely yes, he wasn’t too sure, but he found a few photos of him at another school a few days ago after snooping around his parent’s room. They were hidden in a shoe box.

Most likely yes, he wasn’t too sure, but he found a few photos of him at another school a few days ago after snooping around his parent’s room. They were hidden in a shoe box.

They were hidden in a shoe box.

-

Did something happen to him before he woke up in this world?

Is he a transfer student and if so when did he move to this school?  
_

.

.

.

Spring comes along with the occasional winter showers when things reach their tipping point.

His therapist evaluates him and starts her questions.

“How old are you?”

“10.” -

“What is your full name?”

“Katsuki Yuuri.” -

“Today’s date?”

“February xx.” -

-

“How have you been Yuuri?”

… I’m slowly being crushed to death by my family. Is what he wanted to reply with but he doesn’t.

“I’m ok.” -

“Are you ok?”

He wants to say no. But his mother is close by.

“Yes.” -

-

“Do you want to play another game with the puppet?”

-

“Fuck no it’s creepy as hell!!!” He wanted to yell.

“Sure.” is what he stated instead. His mother is close by...

-

The next few days after his session were always the same, he keeps his head down and quietly trys to avoid his parents gaze, side stepping Mari, and running after the rink and Minako.

But something about this session is different. His mother hadn’t cried after the doctor left. She actually gave him her real smile

_Is it too soon to hope that maybe the doctor will go away._

Because as much as he hates her touches it's her tears that are always the hardest to bear.

-

.

.

.

Hiroko knows what she’s doing is hurting her Yuuri, she’s resolved to let it go. She can't stand seeing Yuuri run away from them again and again. 

-

Dr. Tazawa Aoi tried for several months to gauge how far Yuuri's memory had receded. It’s further than his abduction… He can't remember certain events that he transcribed to her a year ago.

-

Talking to her husband late last night strengthened her resolve.

-

The therapist can’t seem to resurface any of his trauma no matter how many times he plays with the doll or pries into his psyche. The doll she brings is a replica of one Saito gave to Yuuri.

One of his sick twisted creations.

It's a papier-mâché monstrosity in the form of a sickly tan skinned child. A child who looks a lot like the other girl who was never found. _(Hinata)_

She and Yuuri bore a strong resemblance. Short black brown hair, soft chubby figure, even their heights were similar enough though hers was from neglect and possible starvation and not just natural shortness.

She didn't like the evil looking thing.

Whatever the reason behind that doll it didn't matter in the end. She won't let the doctor keep it at her house. It creeps her the hell out.

-

But if her Yuuri couldn’t remember what happened to him back in Sagawa and Hakodate Shōgakkō, she’d let it go.

She would tell the therapist to leave... 

Yuuri wouldn’t have to go through with these sessions anymore _until_ something happened and only If his memories of those three months ever resurfaced.

It wasn’t fair to force him to be with the doctor when she couldn’t even help him.

They felt like they were punishing him instead of helping him.

-

Mari tried to keep him safe by never being late to pick him up. Just like she had been the first time.

Enough time had passed for Saito to get a hold of her little boy.

No one wanted to leave an opening for anything else to happen.

-

His father kept a closer eye on him when he was playing. Yuuri stopped going outside for a long time, almost a year he was too violent to be let out unsupervised, they just wanted to make sure not one would get hurt or try to take him away again. She tried to embrace him more often he spent a year not allowing anyone but Yuriko to be by his side.

She was a little jealous, but it had been the dog that led the police to Yuuri.

-

Their family trip was coming up it was during Yuuri’s school break before the new one would start. Maybe a small outing to that town would be enough to see if he's forgotten... they could keep an eye out for him.

-

She shouldn’t have agreed to let him go that far, but his soccer mates were from that school. She saw no harm in it.

-

Right now she was trying to give Yuuri his time and space, but it was hard on their family. Minako found a mysterious article concerning the abandoned school where Yuuri had been kept in and that's when she began to obsess over her son. She told her husband and Mari to keep a closer eye on Yuuri afterwards...

-

_A cult had been uncovered a few months after Yuuri had been found. And something called the SUICIDE CLUB...Several students made a death pack in Hakodate and they kept it._

-

Sacrifices and rituals had been done under the cover of darkness there. The police never told them a thing about those happening. According to the article, it was the school’s female washroom that had been used in the dark practices….

That's where Saito kept her son from what the local police said. Was he a member? Did he curse her child in that dark room?

She was sure something even worse than the rape happened there, but Yuuri needed this final push. Yuuri could have been a victim and they need to know.

Yuuri could have been a victim and they needed to know what Saito had done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiroko, no. Minako stop snooping. The forces are awakening. Yuuri your inner Yurio is showing.


	6. The Boy With The Blue Eyes.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri is still working on his short program and comes home to a surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which someone own's me a penny for my thoughts and the song is Danse Macabara from Kuroshitsuji. 2:30 version. Why so extra fam?

The April season brings a lot of tourists to Japan. One, in particular, is a young man from **Russia**.

After having won gold in his senior debut the famous figure skater decided to visit another country as a treat.

**_~Yakov was so pissed.~_ **

His heart-shaped smile wasn’t wide enough to convey the happiness he felt. Viktor could barely contain his excitement. Even when he’s traveling to a different country that he didn’t even speak the language of.

It’s an adventure the young man is willing to have.

-

Viktor's been to so many European countries, France and England, being the last, they each have their own charm, but none have the mystery of Japan. 

The land of the rising sun he heard it being called once. He's seen so much in the past few days, he sure he'll never forget. His trusty red camera is always ready to take a few photos. 

-

The locals are polite to him and tolerant his eccentric behavior, he’s always been a little too much. (Extra) Viktor that’s what you’re thinking of.)

-

He’s seen a few local attractions outside around Tokyo and has been to a few other places too. His favorites include a mountain that is as enormous as it is fascinating. (Fuji) A memorial for Hiroshima, the department stores in Fukuoka. He’s going to have to pay a lot to get all his newly acquired things back the St. Petersburg.

It’ll be so worth it.

-

The countryside is beautiful and peaceful and the city life is full of youth venturing out for a night on the town. It's lovely, but on his way to some spiritual sites, he stumbled upon Hatsetsu.

-

It had a homely charm beyond anything else. The shrines are amazing if a bit small, the food is so delicious and exotic each treat he consumes sit comfortable in his stomach, his coach would have killed him knowing he’d eaten any of it.

_What he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him._

_-_

Viktor had so many photos on in his camera that he's taken in his excitement. So much evidence of the cultural differences between here and Russia. He’d have to hide it from Yakov hehe.

-

It was just where he wanted to be right now: the world around him is painted with the pink hues of Sakura flowers, it's something he's never had the pleasure of seeing up close. Until now.

-

And before he knows it the sky is beginning to darken with the colors of the night sky. He’s so full of tasty treats and needs to find a place to sleep.

Making his way towards a few locals he decides to ask around for a place that can accommodate him.

-

Twenty minutes later and vague hand gestures and badly translated words from a Japanese handbook they tell him in English that several places with lodging are close by. He nearly face-plants when they do. Getting there is actually easier than he thought.

Someone calls him a cab. They’re so sweet and enchanted by the foreigner it’s hard to not fall under his spell.

One he didn’t know he even cast.

Yu-topia is recommended as the best place for a relaxing time. It's also the only Onsen in this town.

-

Apparently, Yu-topia is the oldest hot springs on the island having been in service for four centuries. The original family still kept it running to this day. That little tidbit drew Viktor in.

He needed to check it out like now.

-

A place like that was sure to have some grand history inside. Something he could dissect and latch himself onto.

-

The cab arrives soon after and the few people he became acquainted him call out to the driver to go to the Onsen.

10 minutes go by and with it bring more excitement to Viktor’s heart. He’s high on the adrenalin; the Onsen is near a Japanese castle too! He’s gushing so hard.

-

After paying the fare for the ride he arrived near the front entrance. It’s a little past 6 in the evening and the lights are still on. That meant people had to be inside servicing the locals and visitors.

-

Taking the steps up the platinum hair man couldn’t help but marvel at the site. _It’s so Zen looking_. The hotels in cities had a more modern feel, but Viktor could tell this place had more presence.

-

After sliding the entrance door open he was greeted by a plump smiling woman.

Taking in her appearance she looked to be an employee of the onsen. She was so cute!! Such a tiny woman, with a cute bob cut, her warm brown eyes crinkled with a smile as she said.

“Konnichiwa and welcome to Yu-topia!”

The woman’s English accent was so adorable. It made Viktor love her so much more.

-

“Greeting’s Ummm Oba-san? I would like a room for a few nights.”

The sweet woman let out a giggle.

“Wonderful let’s get you checked in.”

-Hiroko couldn’t help but admire the pretty looking boy.

Hiroko couldn’t help but admire the pretty looking boy.

He was such a beauty. If all foreign boys were this sublime she’d have to trade in Toshiyo soon… giggling now to herself she led the silver haired boy over to the counter to check in.

-

“How many nights will you be staying dear?”

“Um a week or two ma’am.”

-

Checking over her books she couldn't help but let her eyes graze over his features... he was very familiar. Like she had seen him somewhere? In a photo maybe? … wait.

-

… wait.

Now that she thought of it, Yuuri had pictures under his bed of a beautiful silver haired man. Was he the same person?

-

Blue-green eyes, pale skin, foreign, and so pretty. She was sure this person had to be Yuuri’s poster crush… Her son was just too cute.

-

Yuuri wouldn’t be home for a few hours anyway, she could ask him then or she could take a peek at the pictures later. Maybe pester her the foreign boy into signing a few autographs for her little boy while he was away.

-

Hiroko was glad she relented a little over her son’s practice hours; His depression episodes were fewer and further than in February now.

-

They didn’t try to watch over him as often.

They overdid it over the past few weeks they might not have stopped their terrible behavior if it wasn't for Minako scolded them. She had to be the one to rein them in after hearing Yuuri cry in the bathroom at her studio. It was no wonder Yuuri tried to stay there instead of coming home. It was their fault Yuuri had to hide away from them.  Yuuri was feeling pressured and starting “flubbing all of his jumps.” At least that’s what Minako-senpai chided them with.

Yuuri was feeling pressured and starting “flubbing all of his jumps.” At least that’s what Minako-senpai chided them with.

She wouldn't let it go until they all swore to back off Yuuri. It really was for the best. The paranoia was getting to be too much for everyone.

-

They all found it was easier to just let Yuuri do his own thing and let him set the pace for social interaction. It made loving him harder, but she understood now. Their family almost pushed him away.

-

.

.

.

After getting all the paperwork done for the room she decided to give the man now calling himself Viktor a tour of their home.

Between going over breakfast, lunch, and dinner hours she showed Vic-chan the springs, bath facilities and then finally his room. Shooing the boy inside so that he could get comfortable she made her way back to her post but not before stopping quickly to check out Yuuri's posters.

-  
Yuuri stood in front of the rink today with his teacher Minako.

-

Today he would be incorporating more dynamic actions into his short program; he would be participating in a few in island competitions this year too. He’s turning 11 soon and felt it was time to show Japan what he could do for them.

-

He could bring home glory and fame for his country. Make his people proud, not like he hadn’t in his own lifetime, but Sochi was still a sore subject even after he retired. Now he wouldn’t have to let that become a stain on his competitive history.

-

After setting up his cd player and asking Minako to watch over him. He skated toward the center of the rink, he got into position.

-

The shrill strings of the violins ring out signaling the beginning of his dance.

Letting the fast and violent strings of the violins lead him on he let himself get lost in the madness the song provided.

-Minako could only gape as she saw Yuuri sail through the ice. She had seen only portions of the piece for the past few months, but never the whole thing, it was masterful even with its few flaws.

Minako could only gape as she saw Yuuri sail through the ice. She had seen only portions of the piece for the past few months, but never the whole thing, it was masterful even with its few flaws.

He had enough time to fix those.

-It was terrifying and exhilarating as if stopping or pausing in between sequences would lead to an early death, Yuuri was fighting for his life on the ice and it showed.

It was terrifying and exhilarating as if stopping or pausing in between sequences would lead to an early death, Yuuri was fighting for his life on the ice and it showed.

-His spins flawless, jumps were hit with every bit of intensity the song provided, he looked gravity defying as his side sequences told the story of two opposing forces battling to the death.

His spins flawless, jumps were hit with every bit of intensity the song provided, he looked gravity defying as his side sequences told the story of two opposing forces battling to the death.

-

All in all, it was a very mature program for his age, but Yuuri was a fighter, he would stupefy the judges and make himself a star.  
(A supernova actually.)

She was impressed with her pupil even if he wasn’t clear with his storyline to her.

“Two sides are fighting for control and only one can come out as the victor Minako-sensei.”

-

She wasn’t too sure what Yuuri meant, but he seemed a little surer of himself today than the past couple months. She was glad she caught on to what his parents were doing. They were forcing the boy to consider asking his relatives in another town if he could live with them for some time.

They were forcing the boy to consider asking his relatives in another town if he could live with them for some time.

-

His parents were good people, just ignorant and bull-headed when it came to Yuuri’s need for space. Even she felt terrible about how they were treating him. If his mind sealed away those terrible memories she wouldn’t complain either. This child might not be the cheeky sarcastic little boy she knew, but this Yuuri was just as amazing to be with as well.

-

And if his mind truly sealed away those terrible memories she wouldn’t complain either. This child might not be the cheeky sarcastic little boy she knew, but this Yuuri was just as amazing to be with as well.

-

Yuuri was panting heavily sweat was pouring from his face as the last note finished

-

His technical skills were a little rusty, but he made up for the lack of height in his jumps with his performance and sequences. Apparently, he was going to be a soccer player and not a figure skater. He trained his body differently too and hadn’t even taken up dancing till two years ago.

-

It was a lot of catching up to do in such short time, but the better acquainted he could get with the elements of skating the better his scores would be. He would work on his Free Skate tomorrow in the afternoon.

However, it was time to head home and sleep. It was going to be the weekend tomorrow and all the boy wanted to unwind and take a shower before the onsen got too busy.

-

Taking his time walking away from his sensei’s studio to his home Yuuri couldn’t help but be elated. His parents had been letting him do more on his own for some reason. It felt liberating to go out and play with Yuriko and hang with Yuuko and Takeshi after school. They indulged the boy even if he was a lot younger than them.

It was nice to be independent.

-

After racing up the long steps he greeted his parents and made his way to changing rooms before letting himself soak in the onsen.

-

Deciding he would have a light dinner then go straight to bed. He changed out of his sweaty clothes and dressed in a robe before making his was to the showers.

-

Not taking notice of his surroundings Yuuri let the hot water from a stall cleanse him of the sweat and grim. Taking care to gently wash his long hair with his special mixture and not tangle it again he didn’t even notice the crowd forming near him.

-

It wasn’t until he rinsed off and got to the springs that Yuuri noticed the commotion happening in the baths. Many of the guests were staring at a silver hair man who was lounging in the water….

-

They seemed awestruck at the foreigner and well so was Yuuri. He seemed familiar… his jaw dropped at the realization of who specifically was in the springs.

-

Yuuri quickly decided to not go through with his soak and changed into some night clothes...

-

_**What the fuck? What the fuck!! What!!!** _

-

Running past the other guest he went off to his own room and began screaming into his own pillows.

Why the fuck was _Viktor Nikiforov_ in Japan!?!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOL guess who's fluffing shit up before unleashing the beast bwhahah!!! Also talk to me folks leave a comment or something I need the interaction. I want to know what you like about this story.


	7. So Many Feely-os.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why couldn’t that man stay in Russia!!! Yuuri reflects on his husband from this new Viktor. Also get ready for your daily feels-trip! Pov changes all throughout this chapter yo. Nothing too heavy just a lot of wtf’s feel me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Viktor isn't too extra in this chapter, but I might rev up the childishness in the next one also, RUN YOU BEAUTIFUL FOOL!!!!

After passing out from the sheer shock of Viktor “Extra” Nikiforov being in his home nearly ten years before he had to face him at Sochi… Yuuri spent the night hyperventilating in his room. He’s not ready to face these feelings. For months after he woke up, all Yuuri could do was cling to the memories of his lover and best friend.

-

He mourned quietly when going inside the empty banquet room in secret and he would playback his husband's music from all his current programs on his little Mp3 player. It wasn't enough to fill the longing, but it was better than nothing.

-

It’s a bittersweet feeling to know about passion and lust and not be able to express it with the person you love.

-

He’s a fucking kid right now, not even hitting any major growth spurts or growing hair in weird places, god damn it!

This Viktor doesn’t know their love, or gotten to experience his touches, or felt his lingering kisses in the morning after a passionate night full of want and desire.

Yuuri _knows_ he’s a young child but not his own mind. It's so dirty! Puberty is going to be a fucking nightmare when it did happen.

-

_Viktor often recounted how he had the stamina to go longer into the night with him. **God-damn it** there he goes again!_

-

The only real upside to this is that this Viktor hasn’t had the chance to see him skate or know anything about him. No judgement there. Yuuri has nothing to prove right now and that's comforting to know.

-

Soon he'll be able to create his own skating legacy. One day they'll compete together and Viktor better watch out! Yuuri's going to be the one to take a gold medal away from him. _Just like before._

-

The birds are chirping away with their songs as Yuuri tried to get up to get ready. He's in for a long day, he'll have to practice with Minako and try to show her his Free today. Not even Viktor being in the same home will make him lose his concentration.

-

The early morning sun also brought a few revelations for Yuuri.

-

This is twice that Viktor has surprised him by being at his home unexpectedly.

-

This Viktor also managed to find him before he wanted him too, but nothing can really help that. Maybe Yuuri can forge a new beginning with this Viktor until it’s time for them to part ways. He’s going to have to go back to Russia anyway.

-

That thought instantly depresses him. He can't go with Viktor to their _home_ in St. Petersburg, he didn't even bring Makkachin this time.

-

The blankets help hid his tears when his mother comes to check up on him. Hiroko knows not to pry this time and brings him some breakfast instead. At least his family is being kinder to him.

He's glad.

His parents hadn't tried breaking down the door to make him talk.

-

Things had gone sour for a bit between him and his parents in January, but after his last session in February Yuuri’s mother began changing. Less invasive and more supportive of his decision to skate, they still loved him just the same. the touching still hasn't stopped, but it's less gripping and more caress-full. Better than feeling phantom nail

-

Better than feeling phantom nail digging into his skin.

-

He getting better at keeping himself from breaking down. He's been killed in a robbery gone wrong. His other self might have died that night he came into

-

It's been over a year since he had been killed in a robbery gone wrong. 

-

 ** _His other self might have died that night he came into this reality too_**... that part might have been harder to swallow than he initially thought. That he's actually a 65-year-old man trapped in the body of a ten-year-old that he was pretty sure had been alive at some point. And that his husband of over 40 years won't remember their history together and it hurt to see him even if it was only for a few minutes.

-

The breathing exercises aren't helping anymore.

-

There isn't anyone he can really talk about his _other_ problems to either.

-

He found something strange on Minako's computer while looking up some songs for his short. It had something to do with Yuuri's school the one in the photo's hidden in the shoe box. Some terrible things had apparently happened there and a school nearby was supposed to have been torn down.

-

_Maybe he could find more out about it later?_

_-_

Yuuri knows it's way too early to be awake and depressed: his parents might come back later on, to scold him if he spends the whole day sleeping, so he just lays there on his bed letting the tears roll down his face until he feels calm again.

-

Yuriko found him a few minutes later after his mother **_mistakenly_** left the door slightly ajar, she snuggled underneath the covers with him.

What a good girl.

-

_His dog's soft golden fur catches all of his tears and for a few moments, Yuuri pretends his own Vicchan and Makkachin are curled alongside them too._

-

.

.

.

He tried dodging his mother's teasing at lunch when she not too subtly let him know that a good looking _foreign_ boy might need a tour guide to show him around. He stops dead in his tracks at the insinuation. _Hiroko knows_. Those posters were getting burned later on he swears it!

His father laughs in the background and his sister Mari can’t help but snicker at Yuuri’s distress.

-

Mentally Mari scoffs at the idea of some older boy hanging with Yuuri. He’s like 10 for god’s sake. On top of that, the heavenly looking guy who happens to be around her age (Wikipedia) hasn’t even met her cute brother. She’ll protect him this time if they are serious about the tour part though.

-

“They won’t let me date, but Yuuri can get a husband?” she jokes alongside her father, and poor Yuuri is turning redder by the minute. It feels good to be free with their love. Mari is pretty sure Yuuri’s brain will fry is the teasing is kept up.

-

Yuuri’s face is as red as a tomato by the time their parents stop teasing him over how cute the other boy is and that if he wants a summer or spring wedding. She joins in asking to be a bride’s maid. Her brother’s pterodactyl screams are too hilarious to pass up.

-

It’s also nice seeing him blush and swat their hands away from pinching his chubby cheeks. Better than him running away or avoiding them the first chance he gets. It's not like before, but she'll take it.

-

Before he was abducted Yuuri would have just rough housed with Toshiyo and grinned affectionately at his folks jokes. Nothing seemed to bother _that_ Yuuri. He was a tough person with a bold personality.

He got that from her.

-

Mari might not have looked like it, but she used to be a Yankee before Yuuri’s disappearance made her rethink her lifestyle. She didn’t like listening to her parents back then, not wanting to seem like a pushover she rarely did as she was told.

That little mistake in not picking up Yuuri led to three months of hell for her mother. The former Yankee cut ties with all her old friends, picked up the books, and started behaving again. She never wanted to see her mother breakdown the way she did ever again. It was her fault Yuuri came back completely broken.

-

Regret was the only thing that stopped her from being angry with Yuuri’s mental change. It was her fault that creepy man got a hold of him in the first place. _Maybe if he didn’t remember then he wouldn’t hate her either_. That the last thing she ever wanted from him.

Picking up the mess the customers left she let the ambiance of Yuuri’s stuttering voice and their parent's laughter soothe her. Maybe they could spend a few days together before she would go her own way.

-

The day rolled by slowly as Viktor woke up. He hasn’t made any plans and the guide book he picked up was actually for a different town then Hatsetsu's. Resisting the urge to pull at his hair for his careless mistake he got up and entered a bathroom intent on making himself a bit more presentable.

-

While there he takes in more of the décor. He didn’t really get a chance to look too long at the walls. He _did_ spend a few hours pampering himself in the washroom though. Heck, he was surprised to see the springs so deserted especially when so many people said it was a great tourist attraction.... (You fucking child you!!!) 

-

After placing his personal toiletries away his room and changing into something comfortable. He walked out into the hallway leading him to the diner area

-.

As he approached he could hear someone frantically screeching in Japanese. He had no idea of what they are saying but it sounded like someone was having fun. But before he could investigate the noises Viktor was stopped by a really cute yellow dog charging towards him.

The dog stopped at his feet and sniffed him and then after the little pup has his fill of Viktor's sent the little thing knocked him to the ground. No one was around to notice the dog licking every inch of Viktor face as he laughed.

The silver haired man tries to pry the cute thing off him but the dogs excited squirming prevents Viktor from keeping the dog off.

-

He hasn’t even eaten lunch yet and the cute little doggie wants to eat his face. Ha!

-

Maybe he’ll ask the owners if they’ll let him feed their cute little dog.

Couldn’t hurt to try right?

-

Making his way towards the dining hall he can see the cutest Japanese boy running back and forth between his parents blushing madly and trying in vain to keep them from pinching his face. ** _So domestic_**. The banter goes on for a bit before the woman for yesterday notices him.

-

“Hello Vicchan, how did you enjoy your first night?”

-

Vicchan? That was a nickname, right? He heard of those things. Suffixes that many Japanese people used. And to think this is his first day being in a hot spring hotel and he has people giving him new names. So cool.~

-

Some adults apparently might use Chan for children or people who are younger than them or even grandparents. It was so adorable. In Russia, Yakov called him Vitya it was a Russian nickname, maybe he could get his coach to call him by this new nickname too!

-

Taking the woman’s words as a queue he exclaimed. “Dá, madám everything here is so amazing, I’m so glad I came here instead of going to the city!” his silly heart-shaped smile blinded all of them.

-

.

.

.

Yuuri can’t help but blush at Viktor’s sweet antics. His heart shape smile is so kawaii. Trying to take his chances at a quick escape before he said something dumb he noticed his route is being blocked by his sister. Who happens to be giving him a knowing smirk. _What A Fucking Traitor!!!_

Forcing himself to take a real good look at their new guest Yuuri can’t help but bite back the urge to run towards his Vitya.

He’s so beautiful. Angelic and soft with his stupid moon kissed hair. Gosh, maybe he needs help braiding it… Viktor never grew his hair too far out. Would it feel as soft as it looked?

-

_**Fuck!!!** _

_**-** _

Yuuri really wants to run away to the Ice Castle and hang with Yuuko before he says something he'll regret. _( Let's get married Viktor!)_

The rings clinging to his neck feel heavy.

Maybe he could give it to him before he leaves?…

**_NO!_ **

-

Viktor notices the boy trying to back away from him, maybe he’s just shy? Sure he was a foreigner but this was the tourist season in Japan he was sure the boy had met people from all sorts of other countries. _Right?_

-

Hiroko knew right away that Yuuri wasn’t blushing because of the teasing anymore. His eyes are blown wide and pupils dilating, _oh my._ He looks awfully smiting with Vicchan already. He’s fidgeting quite a bit, she never thought she’d be a witness to something like this.

She tries not to pull Yuuri behind her.

-

She still wants to protect him from outsiders, even though Viktor doesn’t look like he hurt a fly. Was this really a good idea to let her son’s idol into her home? Minako looked him up for her after she told her about Yuuri’s poster boy crush happened to be in their hotel.

Nikiforov is very famous in Russia.

-

But he would make such a good friend for her little Yuuri.

-

He was making headways in the same sport Yuuri happened to be training himself in. Maybe Viktor’s presence here would be a good thing? Not wanting to seem rude Hiroko decided to give Viktor one of her own special smiles. She was sure she could get them to be friends.

Maybe Viktor’s presence here would be a good thing? Not wanting to seem rude Hiroko decided to give Viktor one of her own special smiles. She was sure she could get them to be friends.

Not wanting to seem rude Hiroko decided to give Viktor one of her own special smiles. She was sure she could get them to be friends.

She was sure she could get them to be friends.

-

Yuuri having a senpai with a common interest would be a good thing. Yuuko was already taken with Takeshi so she was out and the therapist did ask them to help Yuuri make friends. Viktor would be able to understand Yuuri better. They didn’t know diddly shit about figure skating, They all thought he would still keep playing soccer here is Kyushu.

They didn’t know diddly shit about figure skating.

They all thought he would still keep playing soccer here is Kyushu.

All his trophies were from that sport anyways.

They really didn't have a clue as to why Yuuri wanted to go into a sport he hated when all he wanted to do was play soccer as a kid.

-

The ringing of the main phone seemed to distract everyone from the moment.

-

Seeing his folks and sister distracted Yuuri made a break for the front door. He managed to avoid Mari’s clutches, (lol run Yuuri run!!) all the group can do is watch his dust cloud dissipate…

If Yuuri ever decided to change sports he'd be a great speed runner at the Olympics or something.

-

Viktor just gasped as the boy sprinted past the older girl by the door… holy shit,  ** _he's so fast!!!_**

-

He hadn’t been in the room for more than five minutes and he's sure the reason the boy ran away was because of him. Viktor didn't know much about Japanese culture but he's pretty sure he didn't offend anyone?

-

“Was is something I said?”

The doggie (Yuriko) in the corner let out a quiet “Woof.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well said poochie. Poor Yuuri, come back.


	8. Why so Serious Yuuri?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri’s free skate story is revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey folks, we’re going to be jumping in between Yuuri’s free skate and his thoughts about well everything he doesn’t know. Viktor will make a special appearance. And maybe some more heartache so ladies and gentlemen get ready to prepare your feels.  
> The song is Lucas King - Hurt- Original Composition. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFUPIuHayRo

Running at speeds he didn’t know he possessed Yuuri sprinted off to the only place he knew he would be safe.

-

_The Ice Castle._

_-_

He just wanted to get away from Viktor that’s all. The guilt would eat him alive later, but this was all just ** _too much_**. 

Yuuri didn’t want to impose both Viktor’s together if it could be helped.

Besides he wasn’t ready. Sure he felt like an ass for running away, but he didn't really know how to deal with this. Seeing the man he loved for so long, young and spry with his sweet angelic face and beautiful warm blue eyes. Just seeing the man so close made Yuuri's stomach flutter, his skin felt hot in just those few seconds of having seen him.

Seeing the man he loved for so long, young and spry with his sweet angelic face and beautiful warm blue eyes standing in front of him.

Just seeing the man so close made Yuuri's stomach flutter, his skin felt hot in just those few seconds of having seen him.

He wanted to caress every inch of Viktor...but he _couldn't_.

On top of that, Yuuri couldn't face him after being relentlessly teased by his mother. He was sure that the Russian man didn’t know a lot of Japanese, but better safe than sorry.

-

He could still feel how hot his cheeks had gotten after his mother asked him if he would be wearing a wedding dress or traditional kimono. He wore a white tux at their original wedding thank you.

But _Viktor_ , oh his darling Viktor wore a black and pink three-piece suit; it looked so _good_ on him, and on the bedroom floor… God damn it. There he went again.

Thank god he left. It wouldn’t do well to start fantasizing about that in front of his parents, sister, and former lover.

-

Maybe he’d make it up to Viktor later on this week after school?

-

Minako was already at the rink by the time he got there (thank goodness for early morning practices) and Yuuri did his best to greet her and tell her his plans for their session today. He needed to put together his free skate and have it critiqued. He was still getting used to his younger body at the moment and knew it was critical for Minako to watch him closely.( He was starting to grow a little more over the past few months.)

After setting up his cd player for his teacher and lacing up his skates, he let himself get into his head space. It’s just where he needed to be at the moment, so far away from the chaos that was going to be his home in a few short hours. He would let MInako's voice and instruction keep him occupied for now.

-

How long _was_ Viktor staying anyways?

-

Minako ordered him to skate a few laps before he would start.

-

It gave him some time to reflect on a few things. Like where he wanted to go with his exhibition skate after his free.

he put that thought aside for now as he continued doing a few more laps. His body felt lax and tired he hadn't gotten enough sleep yesterday, but he was glad it didn't show. He didn't want Minako sending him home so soon.

.

.

.

His dreams were disturbing lately. He was seeing terrible things during them almost as if his mind was replaying broken memories for him. An indescribable room, a man who's face is obscured by the darkness, and sharp metal things that graze his skin. Those visions leave phantom pains all over him in the mornings.

-

This wasn’t about him anymore, not in this world; his other self - the boy who he had been before he came into this world needed help. Something wasn’t right with either of them at all. The Other Yuuri’s past was an enigma, a puzzle piece that couldn't be put together without all the other pieces. The answers he wants were falling further and further away or at least that's what it felt like before the dreams started coming in. Now all they make him feel is nervous.

-

He knew for a fact that the scars on his back and thighs weren’t normal or from simple rough housing. They looked intentional as if someone decided to put them there.

In his old life, the only thing that marred his skin were his stretch marks.

Those were faded white and didn’t bother Viktor whenever they laid naked together anyways so he tried not to let it bother him either. They weren’t something he had been entirely ashamed of, but they were still there.

-

 

Sometimes at night, he could feel nails scraping at his back, fingers trying to pry his legs apart. (They often succeed in his dreams.) The idea that more than just his memories were lost nagged him on nights like that. The answer was almost at the tip of his tongue.

-

Taking a mirror one night and checking himself between his thighs he gasped... there were more scars. They are crisscrossed between his perineum and deep down he knows that someone had done that to him. He sure as hell knew he didn't have those in his old life.

 

His dreams or "Visions" tell him that the man in the room did it. that the hands he feels on his body sometimes drew blood from him in the most vicious of ways. it isn't lost on him what his dreams are implying.

He's pretty sure his body had been violated. That he might have even been tortured or abused. The evidence is all there, the fragments pieces of dreams that do reach him tell him in that he was locked away and nearly left to die before he came to this world. Was that what happened to warrant getting professional help?

Unfortunately, that wasn’t something he couldn't voice out yet either. He didn’t want to upset his family after being given so much freedom in a short time.

-

That former school of his needed to be investigated further before he could confront his parents about his suspicions and though he is dreading the day this does occur Yuuri embraces the feeling it gives him. MInako's computer would help him look for more. He just needed to get her to let him borrow it for a few short hours.

-

.

.

.

It was almost time to start.

-

 

The longing he so desperately wanted to silence had made it easy to choose his free skate music. The emotion he chose to show was "hurt and pain" though he told Minako he wanted to simply convey longing and desperation. The uncertainty he felt in this world was palatable in the first few seconds of his program. How much he missed his other life was more towards the middle. _How he was hurting inside was at the end but he would try to move forward._ That was the story he wanted to convey.

His parents wouldn’t understand him if he went to them with this, they’d only try to shelter him. Hoping the mournful tune of the keys would guide him away from the earth he skated another lap.

Maybe he would find his answers soon. He really needed bridge this life together. Past and Future.

Did someone hurt Other Yuuri? Were they someone he knew? Where they still around, waiting for him in the shadows?

-

.

.

.

Close by a silver hair man watched in secret, well almost secret, a long hair Japanese woman noticed him and winked. Did he know her? Or did she know about him? Viktor gazed back at the cute kid from earlier in the Onsen. Yuuri? That was his name or at least that’s what his mother called him when he bolted.

_So fast._

He let out a silent giggle. It looked like the boy was a skater too, how fun. Maybe his mother knew he was a fan and started teasing him and that’s why he ran away. He’s never had a fan run away before, wow, what a funny way to start the day then.

-

He saw the boy skate towards the center of the rink; the woman who had been watching gave him a shushing motion, she turned away and walked towards a cd player, queueing the boy to start.

The sound of a piano broke him away from analyzing the morning any further, the show was about to start. He was so excited!!!

-

Song start.

-

A soft melody carried throughout the rink and reached the hidden man’s ears. It surrounded the air with a heavy tranquil sad feeling. Viktor stared fascinated as the boy begun to weave a tragic tale for his coach and secret audience member.

There was something so graceful and practiced about the boy’s form. As if he was already a master of the ice. _How odd. Viktor's never heard of him... maybe this year will be his first time competeing._

_-_

_Off the boy went. Spinning, weaveing, and cutting across the ice. With every movment Yuuri showed that the music didn't guide him: he **was** the music._

_-_

Viktor could barely tear his eyes away. Yuuri looks magnificent on the ice as if he belonged there. Maybe Viktor would get a chance to talk to him later: prob him for a bit. His choreography was very advanced for someone his age it seemed to flow well with the music he felt a little jealous to be honest. Maybe he needed to talk to Yakov about his own sidesteps for this skating season.

-

Reading between the lines so to speak Viktor could tell the story the boy was trying to convey was one of great sadness. To let go of past pain and still feeling hurt all at the same time. His skin pimpled as the notes resonated with the boy's jumps. Whatever this child seemed to be remembering out there on the ice. It was tragic and dark.

Maybe this was the boy’s way to forget and live? To show everyone what he was going through without the mess of words and tears. Whatever this was, it was working. Viktor felt the need to rush the Japanese boy and hold him in his arms to soothe the pain away.

-

The boy's movements were so fluid, so full of pain and longing. Sure his program was a little rough like he was getting a little too lost in the feeling to notice where he might have traveled a little too much, but Viktor could see the overall message hidden within. It was a powerful message, not something that should be considered appropriate for a kid to do, but god was he doing it so well.

-

 

Viktor could feel tears well up in his eyes. A few fell as he placed a hand to muffle his soft sobs, Viktor carried on watching the heart-wrenching performance. 

Dear god did the boy’s side steps sequences pull him in. Viktor's body was shaking a bit as the sadness of the music continued throughout the rink. It was becoming a little overwhelming. 

-

The gentle keystrokes of the piano lull Viktor as Yuuri graces the ice with a perfect Ina Bauer, damn if his hearts not fluttering a bit at the sight. This kid was so breathtaking to watch. In a few short years, Yuuri would definitely break the skating world.

But regardless of the beauty and anguish and artistry that could damn well rival his, Viktor knew he wouldn't get to compete with Yuuri for quite some time. Yuuri looked too little young to be eligible to skate in seniors or juniors. The boy will most likely stay in japan and compete for some time. 

 

 

-

  _Yuuri was pulling sorrow from the greatest tragedies for this. He needed everyone one to know his **pain** , his **suffering** , how much he was **hurting**. Soon they would all know._

-

Viktor definitely wanted that boy to skate with him some day. Even if he had to wait years for it, someone of Yuuri's caliber would surely pose a challenge for him in the future. Hell if Yakov or any good coach got a hold of this kid, he was sure he’d be a champion in no time. Maybe even better than him.

-

Viktor tried skating his’s own emotions onto the ice. He couldn’t always get it right either, but this kid was a master. Did the boy possess what Yakov called a _glass heart_?

He could great technical skill without batting an eye, but his presentation scores were left much to be desired. Emotions were a lot harder to pull off. Maybe Yuuri could give him a few tips?

-

.

.

.

Yuuri’s let his consciousness guide him, the purpose he hid between the story. His free skate would be him moving forward from his death, he needed to get over that part of himself that he couldn't' get back and his short had been him deciding his fate.

-

Could he have let himself move on without trying to pry into Other Yuuri’s life or to see for himself what was left to uncover? No. It wouldn’t be fair to let it go.His consciousness won out in the end. Other Yuuri went through something terrible and needed to be heard. To have his story told. He would make good on his promise to investigate into this Yuuri’s past life. He would let his pain show to the audience, his lost life and lost past.

To his uncertain future.

His life may have been cut short because he was shot and pretty much murdered out on the cold hard pavement in St.Pertersburg. It was his obligations now to continue living after he was being given another chance. It was only fair.

Other Yuuri’s past and future were now his to unravel.

-

Letting a soft smile grace Yuuri’s face he let the song continue. Thinking of his future-Yuuri could tell that he could go further than before, reach new heights, and make amends for his mistakes. Mistakes that would never happen again, not if he could help it.

He made too many because of unfounded fears, insecurities, and his inability to see what was in front of him.

-

The last notes hit as Yuuri slowed down and came into his finishing pose. Hands reaching to the heavens as if he was praying for release from his torment. _Other Yuuri’s torment._

Letting his arms fall to his side he skated over to his teacher only to find her crying.

-

.

.

.

Viktor made his way silently out of the building. He didn’t need to see more, that was so _incredible_. He was glad he followed his instincts and went to follow the mysterious boy. His skating made him want to throw all his emotions onto the ice. He could see his program for this year clearly in his head. But now it was time to head back out and explore, then maybe go back to the Onsen later.

He did have some posters to sign anyways. hopefully, he would catch the boy in the hot spring later on tonight. Viktor couldn't wait.

-

Minako could only stare through blurry eyes as Yuuri went to meet her. That kind of grace was something she had only see once in her life. Possessed by a special woman, the same one who inspired her to dance. 

And to think a ten-year-old boy could possess so much musicality… it was baffling.

He wasn’t even skating professionally yet, but if he could pull this off at the events later on in the year she was sure the JSF would be knocking down the Katsuki’s door trying to get Yuuri to compete when he could. 

-

Yuuri left his practice a few hours later. Minako sniffled a horse goodbye to him as he walked down the stairs and into the night. He needed to head home and spend some time alone after all the skating. He was tired, sweaty, and needed a bath... yuck.

The loud gurgling in his stomach stopped him from moving forward for a few seconds. He’d forgotten to take his lunch with him before he made his escape… damn it!!

-

Yu-topia was bustling by the time he made it inside around 7. His parents hadn’t even noticed him walk past them either. That was a good thing because he didn’t want to be lectured about his earlier behavior anyways.

Making his way towards the bathing rooms he noticed that Viktor kept giving him little waves. Deciding to try and act like a normal human being, Yuuri gave him one back and turned away.

He still needed a shower and a good soak before stuffing his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri why you so angsty? Please smol son let me throw your Vitya over to ya.


	9. Not a Chapter Just .Art

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I drew a thing. Please take it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in light of things is getting a lot of hits and an oodles of Kudos so I figured it was time to show off my Yuuri to the world. So here everyone take a good look at our smol son and some of the characters I drew for this AU. Hinata, Saito, and DOLL belong to me.

http://ab-memoria.tumblr.com/image/159705435572

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love my child.


	10. In Confusion We Strive.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Viktor can’t help but chase after Yuuri. Yuuri tries to deal with his own feels. Maybe he’ll just show Viktor around town? Or maybe Viktor will show up in unexpected places. Slow down there you horndog!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> K folks I’m gonna ease off the angst for right now also I’m going to make Yu-topia a bit bigger in this AU I mean it’s the only onsen in Hatsetsu in this Universe meaning it’s going to be a hot stop for more than just the locals.  
> Also, this chapter and its twists and derps are dedicated to a particular commenter, Kanekididnotdeserve, because they have been a doll to me and I love them. Here’s your very own chapter hon hope you enjoy!!!

Viktor watched as several people began to crowd the bathing rooms of Yu-topia, he could feel his head cock over the side. Hm, maybe that’s where Yuuri went off to now. _He was pretty sure the boy could have used a good soak after that kind of skating._

Perhaps he should make his way over and see.

Strange that his first day here wasn’t as busy as today. Maybe he showed up on a slow day yesterday?

Taking a quiet peek into the bathing rooms he noticed the Japanese boy setting up a space for himself in a more secluded section.

Good. It would make sneaking off to see Yuuri so much easier. Better to have the boy think he was a casual bather and soaker than him know he was trying to intentionally corner the boy. He was already in a corner anyways. 

And well he _had_ to get to know him.

His skating had ignited a spark in him. One that he was sure could help him choreograph his new programs for this season. And what better way to continue to inspire himself then seeing what inspires others? Nothing that’s what.

And the boy’s mother did give him a few posters, he signed them all of course, that kid was going to be so surprised. And to the dismay of his coach what Viktor loved more than figure skating were surprises. 

Now that he knew Yuuri was his fan it would make asking him for a favor so much easier. He wasn’t above manipulation after all and that boy's pretty baby face screamed innocence incarnate.

Feeling a sense of gratitude for his sudden burst of inspiration after watching Yuuri's Free Program Viktor quickly leaped to his feet and speed walked over to his room. He had to get ready after all.

-

The baths were starting to fill in with the usual customers as Yuuri prepped his own space. His own brand of hair care products lined up neatly in behind of him. Removing his hair from his low twin ponytails he winced as he managed to snag the left one… again. He really needed to get some hair ties. The rubber bands were far too painful to use.

Removing the knots in his hair proved even more difficult than before and after pulling a little too hard Yuuri heard the distinct sound of plastic breaking. At that moment Yuuri decided that he really needed to get a brush instead. His long thick hair managed to break his comb after hitting a particularly difficult knot... 

Yuuri could feel the broken comb dangling in his hair and after managing to stop himself from facepalming himself into oblivion Yuuri rubbed the stop between his eyes. It would be no used in trying to fight his hair again. Maybe some detangling spray could help or better yet after he shampooed it he would soak his hair in conditioner.

He never let his hair get longer than the bottom of his neck before. How in the hell did Viktor do it? Resigning himself to his fate he turned on the shower head and let the warm water soak in and allowed a pair of slippery hands to massage his scalp…… ma what!!!

-

Viktor couldn’t help but think that Yuuri was adorable when he stuttered and fluttered about. As another person with outrageously long hair, he couldn’t help but cringe when Yuuri's thin comb broke.

Not wanting to see that aftermath of what would have been worse tangles than before Viktor decided to intervene besides it was time to meet him anyways. Inspecting the hair comb dangling in the boy's dark hair Viktor was sort of was glad he came over, it looked like he could really use some help. Pumping a few globs of conditioner from Yuuri's own bottle in his hand he purposely loomed over the shorter boy and gently applied the white gold in. 

That boy would thank him later.

-

Feeling his body more or less work on auto pilot Yuuri couldn’t help but stutter harder. He could feel his muscles spasm as the hands dug a little harder and pull the comb out of his hair. The leftover comb was being worked into the knots. Whoever was doing this seemed to understand Yuuri’s predicament.

But then again who the hell was touching him!!! He was pretty sure it wasn’t his father. Grabbing the hands and lifting them off Yuuri turned around… and almost died.

All because _Viktor Fucking Nikiforov_ was right behind of him and giving him one of his brilliant megawatt smiles.

“HI YUURI!”

WHAT THE FUCK!!!

-

After Yuuri grabbed his hand Viktor knew the jig was up. He just wasn’t prepared to handle that particular shade of red that exploded all over the boy’s face. _Ohhhh_ it was so adorable, it made Viktor want to pinch his cheeks all the time. _Tak milo!!!_ But seriously he hadn’t managed to get all of his hair untangled _yet_ , no that wouldn’t do.

-

Viktor’s eyes looked so determined, Yuuri just didn't understand why, but the heat of his hands tangled in his made Yuuri blush. He could feel his heart fluttering in his chest. Viktor really was too close to his face, so close Yuuri would only need to stand on the tips of his toes to peck the other's lips; it was a freaking miracle that nobody was paying them any attention.

He felt himself being swiveled around again. Wah?

-

Viktor managed to turn Yuuri back around and continued his in-prompted grooming by parting the boy’s long black locks apart _. So thick._  Viktor couldn’t help but notice the scars on his back… they looked so _unpleasant_. Deciding it wasn't any of his business to pry into that sort of thing Viktor let himself get into a _friendly_ mood.

He leaned in closer and blew air into the short boy's ears. Yuuri jumped. Viktor couldn't help but let out a giggle. The cute boy was simply too tense.

Then he began ghosting around the boy’s ears again and settled on his right ear before whispering softly

“You should take the tangles out before washing your hair Yuu- _ri_ , it will hurt a lot less in the long run, _simpatichnyy mal'chik_.”

-

Though he said it so nonchalantly, but Yuuri couldn’t help but give a shiver, did he have to _whisper_ it into his ear _like that_. Ooh god was Viktor laughing at him. Oh no!!

-

Viktor laughed harder as the boy began to squirm oh he was so much _fun_. He was more or less expecting the boy to yell at him like his rink mates would have. Many people thought he was just too much. Too expressive, too critical, and a bit cynical, but it was because he tried to live up to everyone’s expectations.

It was nice to see someone who could handle his teasing.

-

After calming down his erratic heartbeat Yuuri thanked the older boy though not without sounding like a stuttering mess and proceeded to wash up or try too. he failed for a bit because Viktor decided to take up the shower next to him and wash up too. This was so fucking bad!

-

Though the small space between them was quickly engulfed with steam Yuuri couldn’t help but let his eyes wander a bit; Viktor was older and had quite a body on him even with his age in question. (Yuuri, NO!!)

He really was a beautiful person.

Biting back a blush he let his eyes wander a bit more.

Viktor was tall, with long strong limbs, his silver hair sticking and trailing down his slender neck and down to past his broad shoulders. He had soft definition to his chest and body… go, he was such a pervert!!

Resisting the urge to rush over and kiss the older boy senseless Yuuri started scrub off the conditioner and began to actually wash up.

-

Viktor felt the boy’s eyes wander over him and resisted looking over. The only time he’d ever have that happened kind of look thrown his way was when he was fooling around with someone.

As strange as it felt coming from an under-aged boy there was something so innately different even innocent about how the boy’s eyes would linger on his arms and legs. Deciding not to be to weirded out about it he let the boy enjoy the view.

Perhaps Yuuri was as awestruck as he was. (No, but that’s what we’ll go with huh Viktor.)

.

.

.

-

After rinsing off setting his things back in his own cabinets, Yuuri made his way over to the hot springs. He really needed it after yesterday and definitely because of today. His muscles would most certainly appreciate this.

-

Viktor giggled as he came from his hiding spot behind the rocks. Yuuri had only not heard him, but he also managed to find a quieter area to soak in too. Excellent! He really didn’t want to impose on the boy, but having spoken briefly to his mother she did tell him that her son was more proficient in English and would be willing to show him around. (As long as Mari went along of course thought he wasn’t good with faces and might forget who Mari was.)

-

Watching as the boy put his hair into two sloppy braids he let himself take a closer look at Yuuri’s back. He was an ice skater and knew ice injuries, but nothing he’d ever experienced looked like that. Hopefully the scars didn’t hurt the boy; Viktor didn’t want the Yuuri’s skating to be compromised because of an injury.

Trying to silently creep into the water from his side Viktor didn’t anticipate the depth this particular spring had and only slightly managed to avoid drowning himself.

-

To say Yuuri wasn’t scared out of his mind when he heard the splash was an understatement. Because _Viktor Fucking Nikiforov_ not only happened to suddenly appear next to him, but he was sure the idiot almost drowned in front of him. Why was this all happening to him?!?!- and _holy shit_ that hurt!!

 

-

Viktor sputtered out hot water after his reemergence and not only managed hit Yuuri right in the temple with one of his elbows… he also lost his towel too.

-

The force of the blow more or less knocked out Yuuri for a bit before he felt his body drop back into the water.

-

Viktor let out a shrilled scream and frantically dived back in to grab the boy.

 “OH my God, I’m _so_ sorry Yuuri!!”

Not really caring if anyone saw him naked Viktor picked up the dazed boy and rushed to his mother.

-

After feeling himself be picked up bridal style Yuuri started laughing. In his dazed and confused state, he didn’t notice the curious glances of the other patrons of the springs. All he could look at was Viktor’s pretty face and nostrils…

The universe was _so strange_ , not only had he passed out because he had been knocked out by his Idol’s elbow but he was pretty sure Viktor was tracking water all over the Inn. All in all, it was a pretty weird way to meet one’s former lover well after having him comb out your hair that was.

-

Viktor tracked down the elusive woman after rushing into the dining room. Hiroko took one look at him and his naked body then to Yuuri before she frantically took the boy from his arms. She disappeared.

~ He kind of missed the weight. ~ 

-

The Russian man stood as naked as the day he was born in a room full of customers for a few minutes before racing off to his own room.

This day couldn’t have gotten any worse.

-

Hiroko tried to go to the hospital with Yuuri before he finally brought her back to her senses.

“No, mom I don’t need a doctor, no Viktor didn’t do anything weird, please let me down I need to get dressed.”

Without a single hint as to what had happened back in the onsen Yuuri went back to his room, stark naked, with the intent on trying to salvage his evening.

He was still hungry after all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, yes it can get worse Viktor, you better pray I let you play with Yuuri in the next chapter mister!!!


	11. In These Troubled Dreams.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the night progresses after Yuuri’s and Viktor’s disastrous first meeting Yuuri dreams of things he shouldn’t. Terrible things are awakening, Yuuri you might never want to sleep again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> K fam we gonna hit a few tough chapters for a bit before Yuuri and Viktor get a chance to actually hang out. Blame Yuuri for this chapter and my love of Japanese Horror. Also, I’m sorry for not updating these past few days, it was my birthday last week and I was being treated by friends and family. This chapter and the next are a continuation so be sure to keep that in mind.
> 
> I’ll try to keep the chapters coming steadily.

 

Yuuri trudged towards his room after eating a late dinner, it was pretty clear to the Katsuki family that the boy didn’t want to talk to anyone after being paraded around naked by an equally naked man in the middle of a busy inn. Mari teased Yuuri for a while before he finished his meal and stalked off.

He could still hear his mother softly reprimand Mari… and heard the insinuations after seeing Viktor princess carry Yuuri.

 _(He’s already practicing for the wedding mom, Viktor is such a dear and so pretty, maybe he'll be my new sister in law instead. I bet he’ll wear the dress too Hahaha.)_ The embarrassment was too great. He needed to perform Seppuku and ascend the heavens to be rid of the pitiful feeling he had. He was sure Mari would never let him live this down.

God damn it.

_-_

There were a few things to be blessed with from this little incident.

First, Viktor hadn’t shown up to dinner which really helped the poor Japanese boy’s nerves.

And second, the images of water cascading down Viktor’s gorgeous figure hadn’t gone away. He was sure Viktor could feel him ogling his body. He was a pervy old man, err young boy… geez.

On top of that, He was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to sleep for quite a while his head hurt…a lot: the pain only seemed to add itself to Yuuri’s guilt factor. So the boy just took a pillow adjusted it around his head and laid back in bed.

Maybe this was payback? 

-

He knew why he was in for a tough night; Yuuri wasn’t stupid, he was just unprepared for this right now. It was Viktor fault; he was in another part of the inn, sleeping, without his ring on, no Makkachin to hold, and no one to really talk to.

Was he lonely like he was? Did his mother still exchange letters with him? She _was_ like fifty percent of his impulse control. As weird a she was. His father was the funniest person to be around, always hugging Yuuri and telling jokes.

They were a great pair. But did they still talk to Viktor? Like really talk to him?

-

Viktor never liked talking about his life in connection to his loneliness and it irked Yuuri for a long time. His husband had his reasons; he wanted to keep his fans happy and tried to keep the media from eating him alive. His family didn't really want to be caught in the crossfires of the media so Viktor kept them quiet.

Viktor understood what it meant to be in the public all the time, knew how to roll with whatever story they tried to pin him down with. Russia's darling wasn't immune to scandal. 

Yuuri didn’t even get to meet Viktor’s family until three years into the marriage.

They were all super embarrassing and as extra as he was.

Oh god, they were the best.

-.

Viktor mother was a living drama queen, her eccentric behavior was obviously where he got it from. She would quote Shakespeare and make dramatic gestures all while prancing around. She could spin magnificent tales all day. It was never boring with her around.

His father was a prince through and through. Always polite and mild mannered, he was a true enigma. They got along great; sometimes he’d receive a text with a picture or two of Veronika being extra. He would send one back of Viktor’s dramatic faces (the balding comments usually got that respond).

His brother and sister were twins with the strangest ability to suddenly appear and disappear. They were spooky, but they had years of dirt on Viktor which helped curved down the banquet story.

All in all, Viktor grew up happy and loved. He skated and had a great home life…

The problems only came after Viktor started rising up in the skating world.

He had to be different and started changing for the worst. For so long Viktor tried to be something he wasn’t whether it was too charming or elegant, Viktor always gave off an untouchable vibe. Outside of that Yuuri knew Viktor just wanted his fans to be happy with him and he ended up pushing his family away.

It was their anniversary when Viktor brought them all together, that night was a huge dork fest beyond anything he could have imagined. 

-

Yuuri loved all the dorky things about him and his family. Those people were truly understanding and made family gatherings even better.

-

He was glad Viktor chose him; he was more open with all the things he didn’t like about himself too. Although it did take a long time to get there. So cheesy with all his stupid hair products and trying to buy out every childish thing he could have. White swans were his favorite things to collect. His baby talk to Makka was cute too; Viktor was such an extra drama queen and it made Yuuri happy to find all the little things that made Viktor happy.His own body issues aside Viktor always thought that getting older would mean people would love him less.

He wanted to make too many people happy.

Those were some of the parts he wasn’t comfortable showing anyone else...

Like his inability to connect with others was something they spent years working on, it got better, but he was sure Viktor could have used that kind of help sooner. His closest friends were Chris and Makka for a few years before Yuuri came along and changed Viktor for the better.

He forgot people’s names and was a perfectionist, never being able to talk to others because he was trying to reach the impossible.

-

He was lost for a few years…

He _wanted_ to retire after Sochi.

-

Yakov and the Russian skating team thanked him after letting slip how much they were grateful he came around… That part was hard to swallow. How much Viktor neglected his own rink mates because he couldn’t see past being the thing people wanted.

They were all just people who were there; it wasn’t until Viktor started pinning after him and started talking to everyone in earshot about him. Heck, the whole skater family was basically started by Viktor to try to find people to gush over him with.

Mila, George, Yuri, Yakov, and heck even the Russian Hockey team liked him. Viktor showed them pictures of his dog and family even before getting to know him. It was really sweet. And embarrassing to no end when the whole team recounted stories of their own.

Viktor skated to love songs for a few weeks before he went to Japan… so extra.

On top of that, it was a full-time job trying to juggle practice and choreographing gold winning programs year after year.

Viktor never had time to find his two _L_ words before he came along. Could he make that happen again?

-

.

.

.

But some things in this timeline were worrying, Would Viktor even get Makka back or would he like Yuuri live without his faithful companion?

_No._

Yuuri would simply have to instill the idea into his pretty little head, let him come to the conclusion that living in an apartment alone was not ok and that he needed someone to come home to.

(No one deserved to be alone, especially his Vitya.)

Changing into a clean pair of pajamas Yuuri tried to lie down again and actually go to sleep.

-

Viktor decided to not show his face during dinner, it was embarrassing enough knowing that he pretty much had to run around naked in an inn in front of so many people, but Yuuri’s mother seemed to be unable to look at him in the eye after he showed up naked carrying her equally naked son.

Taken to sulking quietly in his room Viktor looked desperately for his phone. He hadn’t called Yakov in a few days and knew he’d get into trouble if he didn’t let the old man know where he was.

After a few hours of frantic searching he decided to turn in. It should still be in the inn or at the springs. Maybe he could ask the staff to help him look for it?

Viktor slept that night with a sour feeling in his gut. He really needed to apologize properly to Yuuri. It was as if the universe didn’t want them to meet properly. (naw just me)

-

.

.

.

Yuuri slept fitfully.

The covers felt itchy, the only sounds in the bedroom were Yuriko’s soft doggie snores and Yuuri’s sheets rustling again and again. He could feel himself tossing and turning, unable to get comfortable, and on top of that he was beginning to develop a massive headache

Maybe Viktor hit him too hard?

It was well past eleven and he usually tried to sleep at around nine or so. The old good thing was that it would be Sunday tomorrow and that meant he would have another day to try and sleep better and not ruin his sleep cycle.

Sighing deeply Yuuri pulled the covers off and gently brought himself up to a sitting position on top of his bed.

His head was throbbing painfully now. Yuuri opened his eyes and tried to adjust to the lightless room.

-

The darkness in his childhood bedroom didn’t seem imposing like the first time he showed up here, but something felt off. It was as if the shadows were playing games with him. He could see faces again and not the usual ones from the bathroom… he really needed to get some sleep.

Turning on his lights and getting out of bed, Yuuri went down to the kitchen to grab a drink and some aspirin. He was confident that his parents wouldn’t mind him taking one or two.

-

.

.

.

Tiptoeing down the hallway, past the bathrooms, and _almost_ making it into the kitchen Yuuri heard it…

-

_Yuuuri…_

_… it was coming from behind him._

_-_

_( - A violent shiver went up the boy’s spine, his mind was beginning to overlap a new reality in front of him… within his memories a large rotted mass made its way to him from a bathtub… it was a dead body… its lifeless eyes rolled around as if trying to sense him, seconds later it eyes locked onto the boy, it leered at him.)_

_The body was transforming in front of him. The sounds its body made were the stuff of nightmares. Crunching and cracking as its bones rearranged themselves, all the while Yuuri could only shake violently as fear surged throughout his body._

_With its transformation complete a grotesque creature covered in black goo with its inhuman proportions loomed over him._

_Its face was now that of a human man…. He looked familiar as if he knew him from his own fractured childhood. The creature smiled at him (It wanted to devour him he was sure of it) before it suddenly lunged._

_-_

Shaking the vision away Yuuri stopped himself from screaming.

-

He was sure no one was awake right now other than him so who was talking to him? The hairs on the back of his neck seemed to bristle. As the voice cooed at him…

He’s heard this voice before.

Somewhere in Other Yuuri’s past this Voice had been a part of his life, but how and why Yuuri didn’t know. He back tracked all the way towards the hallway and stopped halfway between the corridor.

A new voice began to ring out from the bathroom again. This one wasn’t as familiar, but then again it sounded like a group of people instead of just one…

_Tasukete._

_Help us…_

Yuuri followed the voice quietly, he didn’t want it to know he was there, it sounded garbled and distorted in ways he was sure was inhuman; was everything in his new life going to consist of things happening to him in a bathroom?

Seeing no one looking back at him from the lavatories Yuuri turned around to head back to the kitchen only to find himself in a completely different place.

-

It looked like he was in a school locker room.

Though it was a little dark a few flickering lights overhead helped just a bit. The only things he heard was the faint buzzing of the electricity. He could feel is courage being sapped away as he stood in the hopefully empty room.

Wherever he was it was something straight out of a horror film.

It was beyond dilapidated, as if no one had been there in years… sure as hell stunk too. Taking his sleeved arm he pressed it against his nose.

Many of the lockers were dented and rusted over with several doors hanging from their hinges.

It was almost as if they had been forcefully ripped off.

Yuuri could only guess from how the layout was formed that it was mostly likely a females gym locker room. He couldn’t make out anything outside the edges of the flickering lights.

It was at that moment when the sound of running water came on.

_Shit._

-

Moving through the rows of lockers, Yuuri quietly prayed to himself. His heart was pounding loudly in his chest, palms sweated profusely as he continued to walk between row after endless row of rusted lockers. They seemed to go on forever.

He could feel his body tense up at the sound of his own footsteps. It also felt like something was following him. He didn’t want to turn around… he wasn’t going to.

Tears were stinging his eyes… he could feel his lips wobbling, he was so close to losing it then and there.

Trying in vain to not let out a few soft whimpers Yuuri bit his lips.

-

.

.

.

The locker room suddenly began warp around him as he got closer to what he hoped was an exit… it forced him to backtrack until he quite literally found himself facing a set of new doors. Doors that lead to some private baths.

He went inside and looked around.

There were several shower stales and some separate tubs lined up along the walls. The tub that had the running water was all the way towards the corner of the room.

-

Getting closer to the edge of that bathtub Yuuri looked inside… black murky water as endless as the night greeted him. It felt familiar. He could also make out that the knob to the water was turning itself off… right in front of him.

His stomach lurched violently … this. This had to be a dream.

The water began to stir: churning itself up and down.

Taking a step back he heard the voice calling him again only this time it was behind him.

Looking over to the doorway he saw it closing itself shut.

Yuuri could barely make out the sounds coming from the tub as he screamed.

-

_Welcome home, Yuuri._

-

It sounded like several children trying to speak over one another only it was now muffled due to the closed door. Giving up all pretenses of being brave Yuuri began to openly sob and ran towards the closed door.

-

_What did those kids want and how did he get here. Yuuri wanted to go home he was pretty sure he was about to piss himself…. HE NEEDED TO GET OUT OF HERE!!!_

_-_

Trying the locked knob several times Yuuri was about to start kicking at the door when felt a warm puff of breath tickle his neck… Yuuri felt a hand on his shoulder seconds later. Looking towards the hands Yuuri let out another horrified scream. They were long almost like talons and black smelly goo seeped out of several opened festering wounds. He could see its bones jutting out…

-

_Hello again my precious boy…_

_-_

_Not wanting to look Yuuri closed his eyes, the monster only smiled at the terrorized boy before extending and enlarging its deformed mouth over the back of his Yuuri’s head… it was so close now. His dear Yuuri was home._

_Feeling sharp teeth dig into his scalp Yuuri let out a final frantic scream before passing out._

_-_

Hiroko was the first one to Yuuri’s room as soon as she heard his screams...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you sure you're ok Yuuri?  
> I have doodles if anyone wants to see them??? Maybe after chapter 12, I'll post them.


End file.
